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Grains of Sound: The Great White Hoax

December 29, 2015July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / Leave a comment

Chris Exeris (Christopher Michael Sevanick) believes the world owes him success, without having to actually work for it

This one has been a long time in coming.

Actually, quite a few of the upcoming articles have been a long time in coming, but we’ll get to that later.

I will try to be as concise and to the point as possible, because I know there’s no reason to draw this out, and readers want their information quickly.

You’re welcome to scan, and check out the sound cloud links at your leisure.

Let’s get started, shall we?

Christopher Michael Sevanick, AKA “Chris Exeris”, AKA “Grains of Sound” (his brother Jason is only part of GOS in the studio, another thing that shall be addressed in this review), has hit the big time!

He’s scored “Odyssee 2015”, in Berlin, for New Years Eve.

Of course, this is the same party I stated that if he was anyone or anything, he would have been spinning in 2013 (this becomes relevant, later)

First, I will provide a more in depth review of Grains of Sound.

The first thing anyone should know is that Christopher Michael Sevanick, aka Chris Exeris, doesn’t even write half the music for Grains of Sound. Most sound design, and anything that is bass or beat oriented (and I don’t mean the binaural beats that he layers into the music, to hypnotize those with weak minds, like Ania Ziolkowska), is written and produced by his brother, Jason Sevanick, aka Jason Durant.
Jason has been carrying Chris for over a decade.

Jason is not from NYC, as he keeps telling everyone. He’s from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He has a degree in sociology, which means he knows how to manipulate people and groups.

He claims NYC, in order to seem “cool”, internationally. He’s actually in Pittsburgh, as I write this, dealing with the impending death of his father (the family are all alcoholics), but that is subject for another upcoming article.

Chris Exeris is from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, not New York City

All Chris wants is to be famous, and he wants to be famous the easiest way possible.
He started as an activist, because, as we all know, activism attracts narcissists, and not any activist, but a PAID activist.
So he didn’t represent anything because he actually believed in it, but because he was PAID to.

Chris Exeris is all about the image. He does just enough to get noticed, and nothing more.

Let that sink in, when listening to Mindless Faith, or Grains of Sound.

As a musician, he is mediocre, at best.

I wrote a review a while back, to illustrate the deception of how he markets himself, and how he feels the world owes him everything.

He countered by actually beginning to admit his brother helps him write the music for Grains of Sound.

He’s no longer part of Mindless Faith, not only because he actually contributed nothing whatsoever, but also because his bandmates began to see is current affair with Ania Ziolkowska for what it is:

Yoko Ono, Breaking up the Beatles. Except they’re not even the Beatles.

However, this isn’t about Ania Ziolkowska emulating Marie Curie, riding on fame that is not even hers, because she is incapable of any type of creativity whatsoever, herself.

No, this is about the fact that, after, again, listening to every single thing Grains of Sound has ever made, I came upon one truth:

IT LACKS PASSION

Chris may have learned how to use Ableton Live, but he hasn’t learned how to emote anything besides anger, and the productions of Grains of Sound are missing even THAT.

Ignoring that of all the dance music, psytrance holds the least emotion in it’s supposed music, Grains of Sound holds even less than that.

Listen to one of his tracks he made when he was in Poland, away from his brother. Be it “Trees Tell me their Secrets”, or “Booming Dunes“, you hear there’s not one modicum of emotion in either of them. You also learn that if there’s a “beat”, he’s incapable of making it. For that, he needs Jason.
See, the problem is he may technically know what to do in Ableton (and barely even that. Trees Tell me there secrets is over saturated in reverb), but translating any passion he MIGHT have into music just isn’t possible for him.

There’s such an overuse of phasing, and saturation, to mask the binaural beats he has layered within it, it has an immediately feeling of foreboding.

It’s suffocating.
It’s OPPRESSIVE.

It’s definitely not a vampire, I will give it that. It doesn’t wait for you to invite it in.
No.

It doesn’t ask you out, seduce you, attempt to woo you.
No, absolutely not.
It attempts to force it’s way into your mind, like a home invasion robbery.

IF THIS TRACK WERE HUMAN, IT WOULD BE A RAPIST.

I still don’t understand how someone who claims to have been producing for 15 years can be this BAD………

So how, you may ask, does someone like this get a gig like Odyssee?

Simple:

The moment I stated he needed to, to be known, he made the moves of meeting just the right people, both in Poland and Berlin, faking that he’s an NYC rock star, to get into the slot.

However, he had the use of friends of a friend, from NYC, to get there. And he wasn’t even supportive of him, when his wife died.
Basically, Chris charmed his way in.

Chris Exeris Charmed his way into the German psytrance scene through Poland

And he’s still a last minute decision, just as he was for the Zagoa festival in Cairo. He’s playing at the top of the evening, when most will be on the dance floor of the main room.

As you can see, Chris Exeris is playing at the TOP of the evening. Of course people will actually want to visit the chill out area MUCH later

And anyone that does hear him will realize that, without drugs, he’s a huge disappointment.

And this “Live Synth Performance”?

People, he’s using Ableton.

ANYONE can program scenes and clips to be triggered by a midi controller. I do that myself.

The set itself is pre-programmed, because he’s not even capable of mixing anything his brother didn’t make for him.

Chris Exeris doesn’t even OWN a synth.

So, congratulations, Grains of Sound. Congratulations on the opportunity to disappoint a larger set of listeners.

Author’s Note:

I wanted to get this in under deadline, so it’s actually unfinished. It will be an evolving article, as I transfer resources from my old iMac to my new Mac.

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“Gone Girl” : The Devil’s Greatest Trick

October 21, 2014July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / 4 Comments

“The Dental School, please.” I said as I stepped into the taxi.

“The dental school?” asked the african male driver, “What are you getting done?”

“They’re doing a root canal, to prepare for my implants.”

“Implants? Aren’t those painful? how did you lose the teeth?”

“My estranged wife knocked them out.”

Silence

“May I ask how that happened?”

“We were on a trip to Wildwood, NJ. It was the end of the trip. It had not been a good trip. She had been fighting with me before we left, and she did some things that were really disrespectful, like kissing a girl in a bathroom, and then telling me to deal with it.”

“What???”

“Yes, that happened. Then, after a less than stellar weekend with friends, we were all driving back, and they asked us to stop at a house on the way. I asked her to come in and she refused. I knew it would take a long time, and I wanted her to come in because I know I am non-confrontational, and would not be able to get them to hurry it up, so we could get home.”

“Okay.”

“So over an hour passed, and she finally comes in. I’m sitting on the couch with them. She just stands there, staring at me, and asks me to show her where the bathroom is. They tell us where it is, and she asked me to come with her. It was next to the kitchen. She doesn’t go to the bathroom, but pulls me into the kitchen. She had me sit her up on the counter, literally had me pick her up to place her on it, and I thought we were going to talk.”

“So what happened?”

We’re stuck in traffic, on the way to the NYU School of dentistry, so I actually have time to tell him this story. It’s rare that NYC taxi Drivers actually talk to you any longer, so, since he’s interested, I continue.

“She’s sitting there, and I’m waiting for her to talk, and then, suddenly, she raised her left fist, and tried to bring it down on my face. I was surprised, but I caught it. She lifted her right fist and did the same thing. I caught that one also.”

“WHAT?? Where did that come from? Why did she do that?”

“I have no idea, but that’s not the end of it. She then quickly leaned back, shoots forward, head buttes me in the mouth.”

“WHAT THE HELL???”

“Yes. I let go of her wrists, and grabbed my mouth. She leaned back, crossed her arms, and smiled.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“I wish I were.”

Silence, then, as he turns the corner,

“What happened after that?”

“I had to get a root canal, because the tooth was pressing against the nerve. Her dentist. She suggested him. I found out later they should have just tapped the tooth back into the canal.”

“But how does this become implants?”

“Well, because her dentist was an idiot, some Doctor Paul Stanciewickz, this was back in Virginia, the root canal was never finished, and that, according to my new Doctors, allowed for infection to get up into my gums. That spread to four other teeth, so now I am forced to pay almost $40,000 to replace the six teeth. One lower tooth is random. No idea why that one had to come out.”

“She knocked out your teeth. She’s not paying for any of this?”

The denture I have to wear, due to the teeth Ania Ziolkowska knocked out by head butting me in the mouth

“Nope. And missing teeth causes a lot of problems. Go on interviews, and even if I’m wearing a three piece suit, they still judge you on your appearance. Teeth missing right in front of your mouth makes them think you’re a crack head. I have six teeth to replace, and she’s partying around the world and not paying a dime.”

“You’re serious?”

“Yup. She played victim after the tooth came out, cheated with some DJ, and ran off to Poland, then India, a place she knew I wanted to go to since 2001, when we met, and then moved here, to New York, before me, after refusing to for YEARS, with the DJ. Made a point to connect with people I met a year before her, while she was out of the country, and cried victim and said I was the one that abused her.”

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays.
Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then “punished” herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

“What the fuck???”

We’re getting close to the Dental School now, but he still wants to talk.

“Can’t you sue her?”

“Statute of limitations. I can’t do a thing.”

“Didn’t you press charges when she attacked you?”

“We were together, getting married. Of course I loved her, so I was an idiot and didn’t. Anyway, have you ever tried to be a guy reporting domestic violence from a woman?”

“You know what? I know what you mean. My friend is going through the same thing. His wife beats him and embarrasses him, and they don’t do anything about it.”

“Exactly, and in Virginia, it’s even worse.”

“So what did you do?”

“The only thing I could do, I started a blog.”

“Really?”

“Well, first I tried to party, and distract myself from everything, but she kept pulling things, while she was out of the country, like contacting my employers and ruining positions for me. I even became suicidal at one point. It’s hard for a man, in this situation, because no one believes you. YOU are always the bad guy.”

It didn’t even take him a second to ponder this.

“Man, thank you. You’re right. There’s NO protection for men against women. We’re just told to deal with it, be a man, get over it. Thank you for what you’re doing. No one does this. No one helps men who are attacked by women. Thank you so much. Keep doing what you’re doing, man.”

I paid him, shook hands, and went in to my appointment.

Gone Girl – Ben Affleck & Rosamund Pike

This is Domestic Abuse Month, and it’s been a long time since I have written an entry. And, in an interesting twist of fate, “Gone Girl” has also been released in theaters this month. Why is this relevant? Before I proceed, I should say,

“Spoiler Alert”!!!!

if you haven’t seen the movie, you should probably stop reading, go see it, and come back to this. Seriously, because this will be an exploratory of my personal experience, reveal what the movie is truly about, and illustrate a huge problem men like me have always known about, but have been defenseless in confronting. “Gone Girl”, now the number one movie in the United States, is, if one were to believe the contrived reviews, about a marriage. “Gone Girl” is not about a marriage. What “Gone Girl” is really about is the socialized control women have over society. Their duplicity, their manipulative nature, how they can get away with nearly anything, but “virtue” of the fact that they are women. All of the reviews attempt to obfuscate it, attempt to gloss over, to hide the true issue, however David Fincher was very successful in fleshing out a veiled allegory toward the contemporary feminist movement, illustrating how damagingly toxic the narcissism of women actually is. “That aspect of marriage as a con game, or whatever. The idea that we perform a sort of ideal version of ourselves that the other person wants. We perhaps belie our true nature in order to perform to the ideal. David and I talked a lot about living in an age of rampant narcissism.”

Women are narcissistic. Women are borderline sociopathic. Women are so much so, that they manipulate EACH OTHER.

When a woman feels “hurt” over her own mistake(s), she will instead choose to hurt someone else, more than likely the man she feels manipulated her (or, to be more accurate, did not fall easily toward her own manipulations, such as the student that fully knew she was having an affair with a married man.) Sometimes it’s because they come from Narcissistic parents (the mother) The absolutely obscure and cryptic “clues” they leave, expecting you to figure them out, with absolutely no reference at all (her maddeningly frustrating scavenger hunts) They manipulate men, and throw each other under the bus (the girl at the cabin) Men are disposable to them (Neil Patrick Harris) And once you figure they are a narcissistic sociopath, you know how to manipulate them back (the television interview) And they will explain away their own evil as “being a survivor” (how she justifies murdering Neil Patrick Harris to her husband, and getting away with it) There are so many allegories illustrated in “Gone Girl”, toward modern narcissism, especially female narcissism, in this film that it’s quite disturbing. At least it lets me know I’m not the only one that has seen this, both in relationships and in society. Oh! I almost forgot: Narcissists have a limited bag of tricks, a limited tool box, whether it’s to attract (the husband), or to punish (the wife), and bank on creating constant emotional states of confusion, to keep themselves from being found out as what they are. You’ll see this MULTIPLE times in the film. Basically, in the end, it shows that not only are both sexes narcissistic, but that women are MORE TOXIC, and MORE DAMAGING in their narcissistic sociopathy, but are allowed to get away with it, because, let’s face it, they’re “women”.

“Women, for instance, concentrate on their body (many also suffer from eating disorders: Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa). They flaunt and exploit their physical charms, their sexuality, their socially and culturally determined “femininity”. In its extreme form this is known as HPD or the Histrionic Personality Disorder.

Ania Anicca how she really looks, nearly busting out of those clothes and double chins

Ania Anicca vain and narcissistic as ever

Many female narcissists secure their Narcissistic Supply through more traditional gender roles: the home, children, suitable careers, their husbands (“the wife of…”), their feminine traits, their role in

society, etc. It is no wonder than narcissists – both men and women – are chauvinistically conservative. They depend to such an extent on the opinions of people around them – that, with time, they are transformed into ultra-sensitive seismographs of public opinion, barometers of prevailing social fashions and guardians of conformity. Narcissists cannot afford to seriously alienate those who reflect to them their False Self. The very proper and on-going functioning of their Ego depends on the goodwill and the collaboration of their human environment.”

THEORIES OF GENDER BIAS The issue of gender bias in DSM psychiatric diagnoses was first raised by Kaplan in an influential article in the American Psychologist (2). She argued that the diagnostic experts (mostly men) who served on the DSM-lll Task Force had codified certain masculine-based assumptions about what behaviors were healthy and what were crazy, such that women who over-conformed to certain sex role stereotypes would be labeled as pathological (3). Her two primary examples ofgender-biased diagn.oses were histrionic and dependent PDs, but she also noted that BPD was potentially biased. Widiger (4) has described six ways in which differential gender preva- lence rates in the diagnosis of personality disorders could reflect sex bi- ases. These are 1) biased sampling of persons with the disorder, 2) biased diagnostic constructs, 3) biased diagnostic criteria, 4) biased diagnostic thresholds, 5) biased application of diagnostic criteri.a, and 6) biased instruments of assessment. Biased sampling refers to the possibility that the perception of a higher rate of a disorder among women in a clinical setting may sim- ply reflect a higher rate of women receiving treatment in that setting.

The myth of “male dominance” is a well manicured deception. And this has been happening for CENTURIES.

Psychology, like society at large, continues to be baffled by the persistent belief that men and women differ in important psychological ways, in spite of countless studies that fail to demonstrate such differences or that capture them for only a brief moment. New approaches avoid the polarization of `male’ and female’ traits, emphasizing how and why these qualities change over the life span, across cultures and throughout history. To understand where the differences are, we must look to narrative, power, and the conditions of our lives.

I have always said if a man does what a woman does, he’s labeled a “Narcissist”, but if a woman does it, she’s just “A Woman”.

Back to the spoilers……..

“Gone Girl” is about a female narcissistic sociopath that shows the entire range of manipulation that women wield in their absolutely socialized, essentially accepted, behaviors. These are the same behaviors I experienced with Ania. As I said earlier, David Fincher and the writer, whom is a female, must have had their experience with Narcopaths, especially female narcopaths, because they lay the entire tool just bare in that film The actions, such as her leaving a clue based scavenger hunt, every year, with obscure clues only SHE could understand, that you don’t put together until after they are gone, and your head is clear of the constant emotional distress they put you through Ania left her journals behind, I can only assume expecting me to read them. (I didn’t read them until I learned of her and Chris “Exeris” Michael Sevanick. I respect privacy, unlike Ania, who read my journals before we were even dating. I realize now she did that in order to read me, and manipulate me. That’s what narcissists do.)

I don't do well with hints. You're an adult. Speak your damn mind.

Ania Ziolkowska would leave the most cryptic hints, rather than being upfront.
This is how narcissists manipulate and gaslight.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays. Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then

Ania had her email address and phone number sent to me via an old email she knew I had access to, but never checked, I realized later, to give me a way to contact her, before she jumped BACK into bed with Chris. She was already fucking him before she left. Uzi Grindler told me. It was Chris’s child she adopted out, after she went to india, to hide her pregnancy, not mine. Little obscure clues, just so they can say you never paid attention to them, so they can justify to themselves what they do to

Gone Girl – Ben Affleck Agonizing over Rosamund’s Scavenger Hunt Clues

you. The manipulation of other women, and men, as Ania did with Eva “Annika” Backstrom and Uzi Grindler (Uzi wanted to fuck Ania anyway

“Don’t they look so alike?”,

Uzi would constantly say about Ania and Annika, and apparently DID, which allowed Ania to get them to ignore incidents they witnessed, such as physically attacking me in the back of their rented Infinity SUV, my only offense being listening to an iPod, on our way to a Stella Nutella show in NYC, and, later, connecting Ania to Chris Exeris, Annika’s ex boyfriend, all in Uzi’s wanting to get revenge upon me for outing his cheating on Annika, which I was forced to do, because he refused to stay out of my relationship – I was actually curing Ania of her narcissism, and he reversed it all, for his own selfishness, Uzi and Eva “Annika” Backstrom, themselves being Narcissistic Sociopaths.) In one of our earliest blogs, we get to hear Ania’s version of how my teeth were lost……..

8:09pm John What happened to make him so fucked up?

8:09pm Dj-vj Exeris he’s been that way for a long time

8:09pm John He says she abused him for 10 years

8:09pm

Dj-vj Exeris made worse by doing meth every day for 3 years (Author’s note – Hearsay. He does not know this, nor can he prove it, which makes this SLANDER.)

8:09pm John Says he begged her to move to NYC and she said no

8:09pm Dj-vj Exeris yea he has twisted everything (Author’s note – This catches up to him later.)

8:10pm John When did he do that? He looked healthy to me?

8:10pm Dj-vj Exeris not sure if he belives his lies or not (Author’s note – Pot calling the kettle black…..)

8:10pm John He doesn’t even smoke

8:10pm Dj-vj Exeris 97-2000 (Author’s note – Interesting as neither Ania Ziolkowska, nor I met Chris Sevanick until 2008. And we only hung out with him a total of THREE TIMES between 2008 and 2010. I met him again after Ania Ziolkowska lied and went to Poland, then India, and told him everything that happened between us, and even have additional proof. As I said, this catches up with him later.)

So, according to Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska (Ania got the “Anicaa” name at “Yogaville”, during her teacher training. They don’t know what the word means, and she can’t come up with anything original on her own. No narcissist can, actually), the story she concocted, is that I did meth for three years, before returning and pursuing her, and I had ALL of my teeth, until TEN YEARS AFTER SUPPOSEDLY DOING METH???

I seem to have a full mouth of teeth here.....oh! And Ania seems to be THIN. Hmmmmm.....

I seem to have a full mouth of teeth here, even if they ARE yellowed from smoking, something I finally have been able to quit…..oh! And Ania seems to be THIN. Hmmmmm…..

This is the story she fabricated to cover the damage she could no longer hide.

But, what’s more disgusting, more disturbing, is OTHER PEOPLE BELIEVED IT.

Why?

Because she’s a girl, that’s why.

Ania Anicca has one of the most practiced fake “charm personalities” known to man

Up until recently, there has been no support, no resources, for male victims of domestic violence. As a matter of fact, if you are a man and the subject is brought up, it is actually assumed that YOU are the abuser. Even the police essentially refuse to believe that women, especially small, petite, demur women, can actually be the abusers (not that Ania is small, petite, or demure, ANY LONGER….)

The CDC’s Web site also cites data showing: “In the United States every year, about 1.5 million women and more than 800,000 men are raped or physically assaulted by an intimate partner,” and 24 percent of intimate partner homicide victims were male (‘http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/factsheets/ipvfacts.htm‘) Experts have expressed concern that male victims have been unfairly ignored due to gender-driven politics and that this contributes to the intergenerational cycle of domestic violence. When male victims are ignored or just “take it,” their children suffer long-term damage by the exposure and are more likely to commit the violence as adults. The mass media often contributes to this neglect by framing domestic violence as “battered women” or as primarily a male crime and by citing inaccurate crime data. The media says “men and women” when covering soldiers or fire-fighters; it should do the same for male domestic violence victims. The National Coalition of Free Men calls on the media for fair reporting this October. As Dear Abby said, “Domestic violence is a human problem, not a gender problem.”

But, as illustrated above, and in the movie “Gone Girl”, a woman can play victim, and get away with even the WORST atrocities (such as murdering someone she thought to use, as she did with Neil Patrick Harris.)

More men than women were victims of intimate partner physical violence within the past year, according to a national study funded by the Centers for Disease Control and U.S. Department of Justice. According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (hereinafter NISVS) released in December, 2011, within the last 12 months an estimated 5,365,000 men and 4,741,000 women were victims of intimate partner physical violence. (Black, M.C. et al., 2011, Tables 4.1 and 4.2) 1 This finding contrasts to the earlier National Violence Against Women Survey (Tjaden, P. G., & Thoennes, N., 2000)(hereinafter NVAWS), which estimated that 1.2 million women and 835,000 men were victims of intimate partner physical violence in the preceding 12 months. (One-year prevalence “are considered to be more accurate [than lifetime rates] because they do not depend on recall of events long past” (Straus, 2005, p. 60))

Do a basic google search about domestic violence, and you have to DIG to get the following results:

About two in five of all victims of domestic violence are men, contradicting the widespread impression that it is almost always women who are left battered and bruised, a new report claims. Men assaulted by their partners are often ignored by police, see their attacker go free and have far fewer refuges to flee to than women, says a study by the men’s rights campaign group Parity.

Or “A Voice for Men”, which, if you didn’t know it existed, you would never find it

From this information researchers found that of the 18,761 relationships, 76% were non-violent and 24% were violent. Of the 24% that were violent, half had been reciprocal and half had not—reciprocal meaning there was violence inflicted by both partners. Although more men than women (53% versus 49%) had experienced non-reciprocal violent relationships, more women than men (52% versus 47%) had taken part in ones involving reciprocal violence. This statistic was undoubtedly the most striking: in committing acts of domestic violence, more women than men (25% versus 11%) were responsible. In fact, in the 71% of non-reciprocal partner violence instances, the instigator was the woman. This flies in the face of the long-held belief that female aggression in a relationship is most often predicated on self-defense. Further, while injury was more likely when violence was perpetrated by men, in relationships that featured reciprocal violence, men were injured more often (25% of the time) than women (20% of the time).

A medical journal

While aggression in heterosexual relationships is believed to stem from men, a recent study presented on June 25 at a symposium on intimate partner violence (IPV) at the British Psychological Society’s Division of Forensic Psychology annual conference in Glasgow, found women are more likely to be “intimate terrorists,” or physically aggressive to their partners than men.

A Telegraph UK article of a FEMALE DOCTOR LEAD STUDY

Women are more likely than men to be aggressive and controlling towards their partner, according to a study.

The research found that women showed controlling behaviour along with serious levels of threats, intimidation and physical violence when in a relationship more often than men.

More than 1,000 young men and women were questioned about any “Intimate Partner Violence” (IPV) they had inflicted on a girlfriend or boyfriend, or been subjected to themselves.

The results are in contrast to earlier studies which suggested women are almost always the victims of such behaviour.

Dr Elizabeth Bates, who led the study at the University of Cumbria, said: “Previous studies have sought to explain male violence towards women as arising from patriarchal values, which motivate men to seek to control women’s behaviour, using violence if necessary.”

Even Time Magazine, though you can see the obvious feminist slant, since the feminists have a huge lobby, and they want to not piss off that demographic, even when the facts illustrate otherwise

Research showing that women are often aggressors in domestic violence has been causing controversy for almost 40 years, ever since the 1975 National Family Violence Survey by sociologists Murray Straus and Richard Gelles of the Family Research Laboratory at the University of New Hampshire found that women were just as likely as men to report hitting a spouse and men were just as likely as women to report getting hit. The researchers initially assumed that, at least in cases of mutual violence, the women were defending themselves or retaliating. But when subsequent surveys asked who struck first, it turned out that women were as likely as men to initiate violence—a finding confirmed by more than 200 studies of intimate violence. In a 2010 review essay in the journal Partner Abuse, Straus concludes that women’s motives for domestic violence are often similar to men’s, ranging from anger to coercive control.

But, as I said earlier, you have to dig to almost subterranean levels, in order to obtain this data. For me to find them, I had to finally do a Google search of “Women More Violent Than Men” Why?

As it is profitable to claim victimhood in this age, a good indicator is whether any condemnation by the supposedly oppressed of their oppressor could be similarly uttered if the positions were reversed. We know that what Rev. Jeremiah Wright said about whites could not be said by a white pastor about blacks, and we see even more of a double standard regarding what women and men can say about each other in America today. This reveals one of the darkest depths of the human mind – when a group is utterly convinced that they are the ‘victims’ of another group, they can rationalize any level of evil against their perceived oppressors. Go to any major ‘feminist’ website, such as feministing.com or Jezebel.com, and ask polite questions about the fairness of divorce laws, or the injustice of innocent men being jailed on false accusations of rape without due process. You will quickly be called a ‘misogynist’ and banned from commenting. The same is not true for any major men’s site, where even heated arguments and blatant misandry are tolerated in the spirit of free speech and human dignity. When is the last time a doctrinaire ‘feminist’ actually had the courage to debate a fair woman like Camille Paglia, Tammy Bruce, or Christina Hoff Somers on television? Ever-tightening groupthink that enforces an ever-escalating narrative of victimhood ensures that projection becomes the normal mode of misandrist thought. The word ‘misogynist’ has expanded to such an extreme that it is the Pavlovian response to anything a ‘feminist’ feels bad about, but cannot articulate in an adult-like manner. This reveals the projected gender bigotry of the ‘feminist’ in question, which in her case is misandry. For example, an older man dating women 10 years younger than him is also referred to as a ‘misogynist’ by the older bitterati. Not an ageist, mind you, but a misogynist. A man who refuses to find obese women attractive is also a ‘misogynist’, as are gay men who do not spend money on women. The male non-compliance labeled as ‘misogyny’ thus becomes a reaction to many years of unopposed misandry heaped on him first, when he initially harbored no such sentiments. Kick a friendly dog enough times, and you get a nasty dog. There are laws such as the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), that blatantly declares that violence against women is far worse than violence against men. VAWA is very different from ordinary assault laws, because under VAWA, a man can be removed from his home at gunpoint if the woman makes a single phonecall. No due process is permitted, and the man’s IConstitutional rights are jettisoned. At the same time, half of all domestic violence is by the woman against the man. Tiger Woods’ wife beat him with a blunt weapon and scratched his face, only to be applauded by ‘feminists’ in a ‘you go girl’ manner. Projection can normalize barbarism.

I received a DUI charge and conviction, because, after having taken my prescribed Ambian, when I asked Ania to leave, so I could sleep, tired an hungry, in an apartment she succeeded in having us evicted from IN ONE WEEK, due to HER behavior (that was told to me in confidence, by the leasing manager of the Aspen, in Alexandria, VA), she instead attacked me, and chased me out of the apartment. Knowing what I just listed above, I got in my Mini, and attempted to drive away. Not having eaten, my Ambian kicked in in ten minutes, rather than 20, and I had a victimless accident. The Mini caught fire, and I had to be pulled out of the burning car. Ania Anicca immediately went to the police, while I was passed out, and said

“I think he was trying to kill himself. He took Ambian.”

But how did Ania Anicca spin it, playing victim all the way, when she tells other people the story?

9:31pm Dj-vj Exeris when she left she left him with everything

the apartment

even paid for the apartment for a whole year

gave him half of her 401K
9:32pm John He said she caused him to get a DUI because he was trying to get away from her while fighting

Said Shee lost him three jobs and two apartments

Lost him his car

She tell you anything About that?
9:32pm Dj-vj Exeris he got a DUI because he swallowed a whole jar of ambien or some other such pills and then got into a car

he didnt have to do that

she didnt make him do that

you see how he is not taking responsibility for his actions? (Author’s note – JAR???? Also, there are details missing to that explanation, as she full well knows.)
9:33pm John He said he did not get half her 401k she paid for an apartment so she wouldn’t have no eviction on her record
9:33pm Dj-vj Exeris he wrecked his car
9:33pm John He told me about that but why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – first time asked. Pay attention. This is a tactic Ania uses.)
9:33pm Dj-vj Exeris she saved both of them from having an eviction on their record. she didnt have to do that
9:34pm John He told me all that. But why was she fighting with him and why did he leave?

She saved herself from having an eviction then
9:34pm Dj-vj Exeris the point is he took the pills and got into the car
9:34pm John Look I sorta don’t care but none of this makes sense

Why did he leave?
9:35pm Dj-vj Exeris didnt he tell you?

leaving is not a crime, but getting into a car after taking so many pills is
9:35pm John Because she was fighting with him and she tried that domestic violence thing before so he left
9:35pm Dj-vj Exeris he was lucky not to have killed anyone (Author’s note – Avoidance.)
9:36pm John He said he wished they’d left him in his burning car after finding out what she did

He has the report where she told them they were fighting and he left
9:36pm Dj-vj Exeris doesnt change the fact that he took a whole bottle of pills and got into a car (Author’s note – Deferral of fault. Still doesn’t acknowledge the FIGHT.)
9:36pm John Then calmly told then she thought he was trying to kill himself and what he took

Was she fighting with him?

Did she try to do that before?

You seein where it makes no sense?

It was his place why would he leave?
9:37pm Dj-vj Exeris makes sense that if he was laying passed out she would be afraid for his life and tell the police he took pills (Author’s note – HOW does that answer the question, and what does that have to do with the question? )
9:38pm John Unless she was fighting with him and he didn’t want to deal with her lying to the cops
9:38pm Dj-vj Exeris and its not her fault he took the pills

and got into a car (Author’s note – STILL avoiding that fight point, isn’t she? Deferral and deflection. Narcissism one oh one.)
9:38pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the THIRD time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
9:38pm Dj-vj Exeris he could have killed someone (Author’s note – Deflected again. You get the point, so I will not point it out any longer.)
9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the FOURTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris lots of people fight
9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the FIFTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris but who takes a bottle of pills and gets into a car? (Author’s note – Avoidance. Attempting to put the onus upon the victim. Victim blaming.)
9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the SIXTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris that is really irresponsible (Author’s note – OMISSION and victim blaming.)
9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the SEVENTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
9:40pm Dj-vj Exeris beyond irresponsible

he could have killed someone (Author’s note – Further attempt at redirection from the TRUTH.)
9:40pm John Look it looks like he’s not the only one avoiding their issues (Author’s note – Obviously THEY are avoiding more than I am.)
9:40pm Dj-vj Exeris sounds like they were both arguing with each other

and it sounds like they did that a lot
9:41pm John I deal with psych patients all the time and she hasn’t accepted her fault in anything That’s just my two cents
9:41pm Dj-vj Exeris sounds like it was a good thing that the relationship ended (Author’s note – Here’s where the Narcissistic Personality Disorder aspect of Ania Ziolkowska REALLY shows. All that yoga, all that mediation, India, Nepal, and still THE EXACT SAME ISSUES. Actually, DUE to all of that, she has gotten WORSE.)
9:41pm John I’m not judging, but you might wanna really wonder why she’s really with you.
9:41pm Dj-vj Exeris and you can tell by whats going on now who the victim was all along (Author’s note – YES, we CAN.)
9:42pm John Just lookin out for my boy
9:42pm Dj-vj Exeris he says he is the victim (Author’s note – And Ania Ziolkowska’s words and actions PROVE THAT TO BE TRUE.)

And that’s not even touching on how Ania Anicca, in that conversation, attempted to make a supposed suicide of someone she could care less about ALL ABOUT HER. The facts show, and have repeatedly shown, that domestic abuse against men, by women, is repeatedly and continuously buried, or ignored, on such an accepted social level that it’s just disgusting. But how can you continue to argue about and ignore THIS?

I can tell you a story. It’s a story about when Ania did meth. We had a friend named Brian, who had seen the success I created by how I made and marketed an after hours club in Washington, DC (another thing I regret, as it put me in business with two Jewish cheats, and Narcissists, Ian Morgenstein, WHOM I INVITED IN AFTER IT WAS CREATED, and Uzi Grindler, whom has already been mentioned above – crazy how Ania ran to the sides of the people that cheated both me and her, which is what narcissists do – they go to their own kind), and began to shadow me, to learn how to throw parties himself. I don’t think he ever understood that when I threw a party, it was for the attendees, not to fill my pockets, or inflate my ego. Brian was dealing and addicted to meth. He was over at our house in Alexandria, VA, one night, and he gave it to her to try. I had to go to work. Ania wasn’t working. Fired, again. I asked him not to have it around her, and he gave it to her anyway. I’m preparing to go to work, and Ania is smashing every single glass in the kitchen.

Every

Single

One

I rush into the kitchen to stop her, and she attacks me, tackles me, and I somehow keep us away from the glass on the floor. She’s in her robe, naked underneath, and I have her on her back.

ANIA ANICCA REACHES UP AND CLAWS ME DOWN MY FACE.

I am forced to let her go. I have to go to work, at that time contracted to arrange displays in grocery stores, dried scars on my face, and the women I worked with, as I was the only man, asked me what happened. I was an idiot, constantly covering Ania’s abuse of me, so I lied –

“Our cat clawed me in my sleep. She’s a little feral. She’s a rescue kitten.”

The woman who was my supervisor stood there and stared at me, grabbed my forearm, and took me to the pharmacy, grabbed a box of “Mecderma”, and told me to buy it and apply it, which I did.

She didn’t believe me. She knew another girl’s claw marks when she saw them.

However, most of the time, Ania’s abuses were NOT under the influence of drugs. Ania Anicca must have obviously been prejudiced, and felt she could abuse all the black men in her life.

“She used to chase me around the house with pots and pans, trying to hit me with them.” Charles Gudet, another black ex of hers later told me.

Charles told me a lot of things, most of which will be visited upon later, in new blogs, just as we will visit upon Uzi Grindler, and Eva “Annika” Backstrom. “Gone Girl” covers all of this, including the ending, illustrating that even when you think you’re free, they still hatch plots to steal your life. For me, that was Ania Anicca stealing all of my dreams for herself. Okay, I think we will call this “part one”, because there is so much more I could write, but it took me forever to put most of this together, just to get this down for Domestic Abuse Month, which this is, and I literally have a decade of abuse to flesh out. But I had to write this, because, as the cabbie said, someone needs to speak up for abused men, so that someone may as well be me (and a few other men who finally have the courage to speak out.) Domestic Violence, like racial prejudice (another subject we touched upon earlier, and will return to later), is narcissism. Narcissistic Sociopathy, to be more accurate. Also known as narcopathy or psychopathy, and “Gone Girl” shows for all to see, both the prevalence of this, and the completely imbalanced scale upon which it weighs. By the way, did you know that “Twilight”, Ania’s favorite series, she even has the Polish version, “Saga Zmierzch”, which is how she read it (probably so I couldn’t read that she was reading about how she was treating me (Hint: Ania is Edward, NOT Bella. We will explore in a later blog how narcissists, such as Ania, project their personalities on to their victims), is about Domestic Abuse? “If you’ve suspected that there’s something unhealthy about the relationship between Bella and Edward in the phenomenally successful Twilight series, then it turns out that you’re exactly right. In fact, there are fifteen examples of unhealthiness.” Next time we will explore how Ania, was going to a domestic violence counselor named Lynn Greenfield, in Alexandria, VA, under the advice of Eva “Annika” Backstrom and Uzi “Ozzie” Grindler. The same ones who would watch Ania abuse ME, and knew Ania had knocked out my teeth, remember? Uzi is israeli, and was teaching Ania how to psychologically manipulate the outcome SHE wanted, with the help of getting the abusive relationship checklist from Lynn Greenfield, and how Ania has assimilated in NYC, and all her travels, by essentially mimicking ME. She DID have ten years to learn how to be me, after all. At least on the surface. She’s still empty on the inside.

I usually save these for jabs at “Exeris” (that name, oh my god that NAME.…), but after this post, you all deserve a treat…..

Part two is on it’s way, and comments can be left at the bottom of the page, but always remember……

“La plus belle des ruses du diable est de vous persuader qu’il n’existe pas.” (“The devil’s finest trick is to persuade you that he (or she) does not exist.”)”

~ Charles Baudelaire

Compliments: How the cunning Narcissistic Sociopath guarantees himself a “Cash Cow”

June 22, 2014July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / 2 Comments

Perfect example of how Chris Sevanick / Chris Exeris manipulates Ania

“Psychopaths, narcissists, and sociopaths are experts at flattery & charm. Although it feels amazing at first, this idealization is actually responsible for just as much damage as the abuse itself. They set a trap, and it’s a trap that no unsuspecting victim could hope to escape from.

1) By idealizing you, they can expect this attention & adoration to rebound very quickly. Their love-bombing ultimately results in a very quick bond, one where you fall fast and give back all of the “love” you are receiving. In your mind, this individual truly becomes the most passionate, perfect soul mate you could ever imagine. You feel and express this love on a daily basis.

2) You share your excitement about this relationship with all of your friends and family. Often times, they already have a front row seat for this constant flattery. Sites like Facebook ensure that the mutual idealization is visible to the world. It feels good to have our vanities stroked, ignited by all of this public praise. [sic]”

The post above may seem benign, however, it becomes less so, when one is learned and observant enough to understand the modus behind this methodology.

Narcissists will pass themselves off as your soul mate, your perfect match, by mirroring you right back at you.
Ania Ziolkowska, in the end, tried to mimic me, thinking I would be attracted to myself.
I’ve never worked that way.
But she, as you can see from Chris Exeris, in her narcissism, apparently does.

To truly understand what is happening here, we shall reference the observations of Leon F Seltzer, PhD –

“But praise has its dark side, too. Much more than we typically realize, it can constitute a kind of verbal bribery, offered primarily to serve the interest of the person offering it. This post will suggest six ways that praise might be disbursed with the hidden intention of winning your favor, or wrangling something out of you—something you probably wouldn’t be willing to grant otherwise.

If you’re insecure, and so require external confirmation to feel worthwhile or good about yourself, you’ll be especially susceptible to (or a “target” for) disingenuous praise with invisible strings (or a price tag) attached to it. Such praise comes at a cost. Exploitive praisers prey on those with self-esteem deficiencies and seem to have radar for detecting them, They know exactly how to raise your confidence—and reduce your uncertainty—through flattering machinations ultimately designed not for your welfare but their own.”

Or there’s this

1. Complimenting You Often

“Of course, you needn’t automatically assume that every time someone pays you a compliment they are trying to manipulate you into something, but someone who pays you a lot of compliments, particularly if they never did much before may be trying to coax you into something. Watch for sugary compliments in regards to your valuable skills, knowledge and experiences.”

Or this

2. Flattering You Publicly

“A manipulator know that if they make themselves seem like your biggest supporter, and number one fan, you are more likely to feel somewhat indebted to them. Be wary if someone constantly seems to brag on your abilities and accomplishments. You are possibly being manipulated without even realizing it!”

Okay, a little background.
Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska, is herself a narcissistic sociopath, though, in my experience, one of the dumbest and most easily manipulated that I have ever known.
I’ll always remember one of her last statements to me, after she had delved head first into yoga, Vipassana meditation, psytrance, and all the brainwashing those toxic environments provide –

“I’m listening to myself, now”

As WE delve further into past history, where we will begin to illustrate others, such as Eva Annika Backstrom, Uzi Grindler, Debora Jackson, Masuda Mohamadi (the owner of Radiance Yoga), and even Christoff Ziolkowska, Ania’s own father, and how she would tell me she was listening to herself, while actually following the instructions of everyone else but her own mind.

You know that guy, the guy that hangs around your girlfriend, (or, in this case, WIFE), and says things like

“If anything ever happens to (insert your name here) I’ll always be there for you…..”

You know.

The creeper

That, in it’s entirety, is Chris Exeris / Chris Sevanick / Christopher Michael Sevanick.

Chris Sevanick is “That Guy”

“Love Bombing”

Love bombing is an attempt to influence a person by lavish demonstrations of attention and affection. The phrase can be used in different ways. Members of the Unification Church (who reportedly coined the expression) use or have used it themselves to mean a genuine expression of friendship, fellowship, interest, or concern. Critics of cults use the phrase with the implication that the “love” is feigned and the practice is manipulative. It has also been used to refer to abusers in romantic relationships showering their victims with praise, gifts, and affection in the early stages of a relationship.

Love bombing is an attempt to influence a person by lavish demonstrations of attention and affection. The phrase can be used in different ways. Members of the Unification Church (who reportedly coined the expression) use or have used it themselves to mean a genuine expression of friendship, fellowship, interest, or concern. Critics of cults use the phrase with the implication that the “love” is feigned and the practice is manipulative. It has also been used to refer to abusers in romantic relationships showering their victims with praise, gifts, and affection in the early stages of a relationship.

Love Bombing is a tool that narcissistic sociopaths, such as Ania and Chris use, and use well, until you know precisely what it is.

Ania Love Bombing Chris
She tried this with me often, and I could tell it was insincere then, as it is now Both elect to ignore she’s still married, though.

As for “Amazing Communication”, something that will be revisited later, Ania cannot blame ME for that –

Ania stopped communicating with me, And then decided we should get married Just like everything else concerning me, her refusal to communicate without hurting is an after thought, buried in a bunch of other diversions.

Narcissists are notorious for treating the general public better than the people closest to them. Why is this? Narcissists are intensely concerned with the quality of their public image, or

What you see is NEVER what you get.

It’s a trap, a snare, one they lay on thicker than a child icing their first baked cake with their mother.
And one they both used on one another, as can be seen by the screen shot above, and this, below

Ania Love bombing Chris on the Brooklyn Bridge, July 1, 2012

Ania And Chris, on the first night in NYC

This is a walk they took on their first night in New York City, which is something Ania has her mates do every time she cons them to moving to a new city

Ania Anicca talking about our first night in Old Town
She tries to repeat instances of previous relationships in new relationships, because narcissists are incapable of originality.
Her Journals will make appearances in future blogs entries.

Remember, this is 2 years after Ania called me an “Ignorant Ass Nigger”…..

Okay, enough of that. This is about Chris Exeris, and how he manipulates others, in this case, with praise and flattery.

Which brings us back to Love Bombing.
The definition above is a good synopsis, however there are better, more descriptive explanations –

This can take many forms. Excessive texting, constant comments on your social network page, emails, telephone calls, or just literally bombarding you verbally in face to face communication. He might overwhelm you with gifts and will constantly flatter you. It feels overwhelming, you are swept off your feet.

At first you will not perceive this as bombardment. You will initially be flattered that he is paying so much attention to you. He will leave you small love notes, send you sweet texts, it is like something from a movie. That’s because it is like that, its more fiction than reality.

Already he has assessed you, and he is now mirroring you, so he is reflecting back to you exactly what you want to hear. But he wants control over you. He wouldn’t have your full attention or control, if you were busy doing other things.

This is an important manipulation tool for a sociopath, love bombing does the following things.

Or, from the same source

“Love bombing is effective, as it moves the relationship forward very quickly. You might spend 10 hours talking on a telephone conversation. Or might receive constant text messages during the day. Numerous emails, or Facebook contact.

This is mind control. The message that you receive is:

He is really keen on me

He is really like me, we have so many common interests

You have known him for far longer than you actually have

It blinds you to reality

It is important for the sociopath to move the relationship forward very quickly. If he didn’t you might notice that there is a lack of friends from his past. You might notice that he doesn’t actually have a job. You might notice that he doesn’t actually earn what he says he does.

His motive, is always control. By love bombing you, he effectively, in a very short space of time, has control over you. Ownership. He isolates you from other people. You can, within a very short space of time, feel that you have been with someone for 3 years, or that have that feeling that you have known this person all of your life. This gives you the false impression that this man is your soul mate. Someone special, that you do not want to let go of. It feels good.“

And it’s that flattery, that “feel good factor”, that they use to get you to do whatever they want.
I find it humorous, almost baffling, that Ania did not even notice her same tool, her trick, being used on her, as she has used it on so many before her, however, that is precisely what has happened.
Chris uses a similar tool on so many others. It’s how he has so many so devoted to him.
So easy to stroke the Id, that no one even bothers to see if it is real, or genuine, or not…….

“Feel good factor

Having all this attention, will feel good. In your mind, you reason that this is the right person. This is special. This is my soul mate. We rarely want to let go of that ‘feel good’ feeling. And not forgetting that a sociopath will often target someone who has needs, perhaps they are lonely. And he walks in and fulfills this part more than well.

Within a short period of time, he will be staying at your place regularly. Your friends and family might raise an eyebrow at how quickly this has progressed. But you reassure them, thinking, ‘they do not know how this feels, it feels so absolutely RIGHT’.”

And this following part applies to both of them. I mean, Ania needed a place to live, without begging back to me and actually apologizing, and Chris needed the extra funds to move to NYC (But we’ll go into the details of that in a later blog).
And, how else could the failure of a tour he’s been on for a year (which has mostly been Poland and Berlin), been accomplished, if Ania’s family didn’t have an apartment in Warsaw (her expired grandmother’s old home, that we were supposed to live in, and raise our children in)?

Of course Chris has out manipulated Ania.

London is so expensive! (Because Ania is paying for everything)

That post was made so it won’t seem as though Chris is COMPLETELY living off of Ania…….

London is so Expensive, because Ania is paying for everything
That has to be embarrassing, so Ania helps to cover their embarrassment

However, if that doesn’t hit home, there’s also this one

Must be nice to have someone Buy a laptop for themselves, just for YOUR own sole usage, huh, Chris?

Not too long ago (2012), Chris was speaking as though he was the one buying a new laptop, however, how did that happen, if his is still 6 years old?
And then you realize, and I do have the post where Ania says so, as she was literally GIVING him HER laptop, to take to the Sahara desert, that Ania bought the laptop, probably from whatever she had left from the 401K she used me to cash out, so he could use it.
Of course, this begs the question of how Chris can help anyone buy a laptop, when he doesn’t even know how to fix one?

I always fixed our computers when Ania was abusing me.

But, the interesting development, is that he’s recently begun to come forward and state it’s Ania’s Laptop, and not his own.
Wonder what brought that on?
Because she now controls where they live and how they live and he doesn’t?

But, again, I digress…..

See, Chris manipulates Ania, through flattery and Love Bombing, so she will continue to “buy” his love, just as he manipulates others the same exact way.
It’s amazing how many have not even bothered to notice this, because, like Ania, they are so desperate to have their egos stroked, they never bother to see that they are actually being manipulated.
He turned the tables on her, and her codependency has allowed him to manipulate her to no end.

This is the emotional abuser’s trap. They are invincible. They groom you to shower them with praise & adoration, so you effectively checkmate yourself once the abuse begins. Survivors often find their own friends taking the side of their abuser. It’s devastating, and this trap is the final nail in the psychopathic coffin.

She is, in essence, His “Cash Cow”.

And why buy that cow, when you can get the milk, the barn, and even her own grain, for free, right?

Truth be told, I have several other examples of this, and may revisit this in a future time, however, to be honest, I truly despise formatting in wordpress, which is why I don’t write as often as I would like.

Featured

Narcissist, Sociopath, Racist……. (Ania Ziolkowska)

May 1, 2014July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / 9 Comments

“FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING IGNORANT ASS NIGGER!!!”

Louis Vuitton – RACIST

Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska, current day, at a drug infested psytrance party in Warsaw, Poland, March 2014 She’s the one smiling, to the right, dressed all in black. We’ll talk about her massive weight gain in another blog.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, October 18th, 2015 In queens, at Psychill Psysundays.
Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then “punished” herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

I stopped cold, my heart stopped, I nearly dropped the muffler on my head.
I was frozen, and it was over 75 degrees F

I just couldn’t believe she said it.

Someone I cared about, and was willing to die for, and would have done anything for, using the worst possible term in the worst possible way, for no reason at all.

If I had attacked Ania Ziolkowska, now going by “Ania Anicca” (A subject to be touched on in another entry), I could almost understand it.
Hell, if I had called her a bitch or a cunt, it might have been justified.

But that’s not what happened.

All I did was ask her, for the third time

“Ania, could you please hold the flashlight lower? I can’t see what I’m doing.”

That’s it.
THAT is what got the response that opens this experience.

We had bought a Jaguar XJ-S, a 1989, from a gentleman in Connecticut, and driven it back to Woodbridge, VA, where we both lived.
Ania has just been fired from the position I had arranged for her to get, when she was let go from a receptionist position she had been doing a week before.

So she would not have to wait for me, I gave her the keys to the Jag, and told her she could go home and get me later, when I got off.

We worked at the same place.

It turns out that one of the exhaust hangers, a special order item, had rusted through, and the muffler fell off, and Ania had been dragging it behind her.

The FIRST thing I told Ania, when she told me what had happened, was it wasn’t her fault.

It could have happened to ANYONE, it just happened to happen to her.

Not her fault.

I didn’t blame her, and I told her so.

Apparently that didn’t matter.

“FUCK YOU, YOU IGNORANT ASS NIGGER!!”

That’s what I got, from the blonde haired, blue eyed, Polish, white girl, while I was lying under the car, in a Wal-Mart parking lot, trying to find a way to hang the muffler, so we could get home, no longer dragging it under us.

And it wasn’t the last time Ania Ziolkowska, Ania Anicca, or whatever she wants to call herself now, as she vagabonds around the world, scamming family members, pretending she is suddenly a “spiritual yogini”, committing adultery with the ugliest white guy anyone has ever seen, Chris “Exeris” Sevanick

“He looks like a thumb….”

That was one of the most recent descriptions, by my 21 year old female friend, before she showed the picture of “Exeris” (my god, these nicknames, they do not FIT. The latin it comes from is everything BUT an accurate description of HIM…..) to her friends, and her girlfriend.

“He is NOT an attractive man.”

Is another description of “Exeris” (I’m sorry, but I chuckle every time I see the name, type the name, HEAR THE NAME) was the description given by several other females that have seen him.

But I digress.

This is not about THAT joke of a human being, but about Ania Ziolkowska, Racist Covert Stealth Narcissist Sociopath.

We could say one could not fault Ania, due to her father, Christoff Ziolkowska (whom Ania attempted to fool me for YEARS, into believing his name was “Ziolkowski”, however the name on their Deed to their house, is “Ziolkowska”. Ania tried Gaslighting for YEARS…..), also being a racist.

The first time I met him, I was standing in their second home (yes, Ania’s family is comfortably well off, I didn’t learn till MUCH later, while Christoff would complain how hard it was to make it in this country, but has a sailing yacht, and for years, two homes, completely paid off, and in relatively high dollar areas of Lake Ridge, VA) standing in front of him with my three year old niece, reaching out my hand to shake his.

“Get out of my house.”

Was all I got in return.

Not even a hand shake.

As I walked out, I just chuckled……..

………….and then had to explain to a three year old what racism was.

Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska would use racial slurs as a way to erode my self esteem and confidence

But I wasn’t the only black man Ania Ziolkowska had ever dated.

There was one before me.

Charles Gudet

And, apparently, Ania’s father, Christoff, liked him, probably because he was lighter than me, probably because his father worked for one of the alphabet agencies in DC, probably because he had had a trust fund, that Ania promptly conned and cajoled him into spending……..ON HER.

Every penny.

Ania Ziolkowska bled him dry.

I met Charles, when we moved to Old Town, Alexandria, because that is where Ania wanted to move, one of the most expensive cities in Virginia, bordering DC.

I should have realized THEN what Ania was, but I still didn’t.

I was blinded by love………..

THAT will NEVER happen again.

Ania never apologized.

I should be fair……Ania never apologized without being told she NEEDED to apologize.

This was a constant issue with Ania, the fact she would do horrendous things to you, THINGS SHE WOULD NOT ALLOW DONE TO HER, and she would NEVER apologize.

Not once

I waited to see if she would realize what she did was wrong. If she would have any sense of remorse, any awareness to even NOTICE HOW IT AFFECTED ME.

I waited a week

She did not care.
Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowksa did not have one iota of care, of empathy, of compassion, for how she treated me, at all.
Ania’s only concern was Ania.

I finally told her she needed to apologize for what she said, for what she did.
“But, I thought that was okay? Like when someone says ‘Nigga, please!’ That’s not okay?”

Okay, hold on a second.
I know we should get on to what the worth is of an apology you have to ask for, but let’s hold off on THAT for a second.

The real issue here is how do you live in the suburbs of Woodbridge, Virginia, go to the high school WE BOTH went to, live in the United States since you were SEVEN YEARS OLD, NOW TWENTY EIGHT (at the time), and NOT know that you don’t say that to a black man, especially one that has never conducted himself as the average black man (the stereotype), and is someone you claim to love??????

And I, stupidly falling for this act, explained to her how they were different things, and it was NOT okay.

Animals don’t know or care about Racism

But, even after all of this, that wasn’t the last time she did it.

Angry Wolfeboro residents called for a police commissioner to resign after he admitted using a the “N – Word” to describe the president. The worst part is he admits it, but will not apologize. #WTF

That wasn’t the last time Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska called me a nigger, unprovoked, and uncalled for.

(To be continued)

You deserve a treat after all of that, so here you go.

Identifying Individuals with Antisocial Personality Disorder Using Resting-State fMRI (plosone.org)
Surprising Myths & Facts About Antisocial Personality Disorder (psychcentral.com)
Antisocial personality disorder: the hidden epidemic (oup.com)
Antisocial Personality Disorder…being aware of the signs (jou300202.wordpress.com)
Ashley Smith was textbook case of antisocial personality disorder, inquest told (globalnews.ca)
Does Capitalism teach, reinforce, and even promote Antisocial Personality Disorder? (anarchoworld.wordpress.com)
Snakes in Suits? Maybe Not – Psychopathy According to DSM-IV TR (workplacepsychology.net)
Childhood Bullying Causes Long-Term Psychiatric Damage (medicaldaily.com)
Hold Up, One Last Word…..On Yoga and Racism (MommyNoire.com)
Why I Left Yoga (Energyreader.wordpress.com)
Yoga and Racism Part I (bri11.wordpress.com)
Yoga and Racism Part II (bri11.wordpress.com)
Is Psytrance Crowd a Little Racist? Just a Thought (chaishop.com)
Psychedelic White: Goa Trance and the Viscosity of Race (books.google.com)
Netanyahu Turns Israel into a Racist State by Law (imemc.org)
Racism in Israel (thenation.com)
Red Card for Racism: Activists Demand FIFA Kick out Israel (mondoweiss.com)
Racism Alive and Well (raaw.wordpress.com)
Yep, I’m Talking Race (lyngala.wordpress.com)
Racist Filipinos (itssophiesworld.wordpress.com)
April 22, 2014 (iinmediasres.wordpress.com)
Zagoa Festival 2014 (mushroom-magazine.com)
New Hampshire Police Commissioner Refuses to Apologize or Resign for Calling President Obama the N-Word (NYDailyNews.com)
Updated: Racist Woman Repeatedly Calls N-Word in Front of Kids, is Confused Why He’s Recording Her (YouTube, Obviously) (Complex.com)
Woman Unleashes Racist Attack While Her Children Watch (Update) (HuffingtonPost.com)
Louis Vuitton Accused of Racism, Slapped with Racial Discrimination & Harassment (HuffingtonPost.com)

Featured

Satya – Revisited: Her twisted mind

January 10, 2014July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / 1 Comment

In yoga, as part of the Yamas and Niyamas, you will learn of Satya, or “truth”. However, as it seems all in Yoga are hedonistic and live in only their “Id” ego construct, they will also do whatever they can to escape blame and fault. –

“The id acts according to the “pleasure principle”, seeking to avoid pain or unpleasure (not ‘displeasure’) aroused by increases in instinctual tension.”

An Antisocial Personality disorder will do ANYTHING to defend their REPUTATION, including moving to a new city and convincing people of the “NEW ME”, even Playing for pity is a tool used –

Subtypes Of Antisocial Behavior: Theodore Milton identified five subtypes for antisocial behavior; however, someone with Antisocial Personality Disorder may experience none or many of these subtypes:

Malevolent Antisocial – includes paranoid, sadistic traits.

Covetous Antisocial – variation of the pure pattern wherein the individual feels that life has been excessively unfair.

Risk-Taking Antisocial – includes histrionic traits.

Reputation-Defending Antisocial – includes narcissistic traits.

Nomadic Antisocial – includes schizoid, avoidant features.

Antisocial Personality Disorders also NEVER APOLOGIZE.
Ania Ziolkowska Never apologized unless she was TOLD TO.

Ania Ziolkowksa has completed Yoga Teacher Training and has even been to India.
These are from Ania Ziolkowska to myself (the originals can be provided upon request)

You can see where Ania Ziolkowska attempts to defend her reputation –

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:03, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

The first statement is about as ego filled as can be. the remainder is just you going to your friends again, and not being able to think for yourself. and what do you think you are doing letting people read personal emails between us? the emails are meant for your eyes only.
(Author’s note: remember that sociopaths work to keep their abuses and manipulations PRIVATE.)

Ania Ziolkowska will say, later, in the emails below, that she did, in fact, apologize.

Below is the supposed apology from Ania Ziolkowska –

On Nov 29, 2010, at 12:03, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

I had a couple of insights at the meditation. Both concerned my behavior in relationships with others. The first was in relation to my relationship with Charles, the second, with my parents. I realized that I was certainly not faultless no …matter what my perceptions at the time were. When I was a small child, I thought I was faultless and I could not understand how I could have been punished for anything. Instead of seeing how I could be making my parents life less stressful, I only saw the pain that was being caused to me. I could not see them as human beings with feelings themselves. I figured that as parents who demanded utmost respect and authority, they must have been on the path themselves. Now as an adult myself, I see that that was not necessarily the case. The other insight concerned my relationship with Charles. I was bitter that he did not give me the love and affection that I expected from a relationship, and so I acted out. I did not have he skill of communication. I was immature. I pushed him further away.

As for my relationship with you, I think it began similarly with me continuing this with you. I had certain expectations of what a relationship should be like, and how the perfect partner should behave, that I did not see my own faults. For years this trend continued till I finally began to find my own way thru meditation and yoga. But you might not be ready to allow me to change. You still remember me as this little brat who would throw fits when she didn’t get her way, and feel I need to pay for this before I am allowed to move forward into happiness. Perhaps you feel that for years I made your life miserable, and now do not deserve to be happy. I can understand where you would be coming from especially in light of the most recent events of drama in our lives. Know that I have always done and am continuing to do the best that I can. I am sure that I have hurt many along the way including you as I was coming from a place of pain myself. I am sorry for hurting you.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

It may seem like an “apology”, however, notice the date? Notice the date of the messages that preceded it?
Ania Ziolkowska’s supposed apology was just another act, one she had played so many times before, that I fell for so many times, but was no longer going to fall for ever again.

Basically, Ania Ziolkowska has, though she refuses to realize this, DESCRIBED HERSELF AS A SOCIOPATH –

“Ultimately, the sociopath typically emotionally destroys those who are close to him or her, but the sociopath destroys them in a way consistent with their unique approach to others: They take them out like your average person kills off characters in a video game. Those in the wake of the sociopath suffer because they have the liability sociopaths don’t: actual human feelings that stem from a deep sense of social obligations to others, a moral anchor that is supposed to be part and parcel of having relationships.

The sense of entitlement that comes with sociopathy is astonishing to those who abide by the social laws and conventions of our culture. Where does the entitlement come from? It stems from an underlying sense of rage. Sociopaths feel deeply angry and resentful underneath their often-charming exterior, and this rage fuels their sense that they have the right to act out in whichever way they happen to choose at the time. Everything is up for grabs with sociopaths and nothing is off limits.

In relationships, sociopaths are the epitome of Machiavellian creatures. If they were astrological signs, they would be Geminis, with two distinct ‘selfs’ at work. They are duplicity incarnate, with a polished self shown to the world and a covert, hidden self that has a rigid and calculating agenda: assume the highest level of the social hierarchy and win, win, win. It is often the kindest and most trusting individuals who suffer the most at the hands of sociopaths, and the healing process for these individuals continues long after the relationship has ended. Those in the wake of the sociopath are often left wondering, What happened to me? Why does this one individual have such a powerful effect on me?”

Basically, Ania Ziolkowska is a sociopath, pretending to be a yogi.
And she, like all blinded by the new age, want’s a free pass.

Ania Ziolkowska refuses to see there are steps to apology, that, after years of abuse, expect to just say “sorry”, and it all brushes under the carpet, expect it all to suddenly change to what SHE wants.

See, that supposed apology may seem like an apology on the SURFACE, however what it really is, is just another sociopathic manipulation. It’s a way for her to seem as though she made an effort, when no effort was made at all.

It’s the average narcissistic sociopath manipulation, blurring the lines, so that she seems the victim.

Ania Ziolkowska has just found a new mask to don, a new part to play.

That should have been made clear, due to the fact the “apology” came in 2010, and the correspondence that preceded it, came in 2011.

That mask fell away quickly, because it was apparent to her that I wasn’t falling or it.

It should be obvious, no change was made at all.

Also, that apology is no apology at all, and her supposed apology to ME is an AFTER THOUGHT.

Narcissists, especially female narcissists, deserves oscars for their performances. They are relentless actors, and masters of crocodile tears. They'll put on a show, IF they ever apologize (rarely), but will somehow make that apology all about themselves.

Narcissists, especially female narcissists, deserve oscars for their performances.
They are relentless actors, and masters of crocodile tears.

Ania Ziolkowska is one of the only people on the planet that can make apologizing to some ELSE all about HER.

Narcissists, especially female narcissists, deserve Oscars for their performances.

They are relentless actors, and masters of crocodile tears.

They’ll put on a show, IF they ever apologize (rarely), but will somehow make that apology all about themselves.

And they’ll cry. Especially the females. They’ll cry, make you feel uncomfortable, and manipulate you, and then go right back to acting the same way they acted before.

Apology has three stages:

An acknowledgment that admits what you’ve done (and without being asked, or told, you must apologize), restitution (making up for what you’ve done), and EFFORT (ensuring you do not repeat that action, or SIMILAR actions).

A narcissist will play with this.

They will put on the show to manipulate you into forgiving them, they’ll expect to SKIP that restitution step, and they’ll play with the effort part, gaslighting you into believing they didn’t do the SAME EXACT thing, so how can they be at fault when they knowingly do something similar, AGAIN?

Now begins the display of her sociopathic delusions, Do not believe the flattery she so freely lavishes about. It’s another manipulation I refused to fall for –

Ania Ziolkowska, Still married to me, no legal separation, committing adultery with Chris M Sevanick / Chris Exeris

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca , Still married to me, no legal separation, committing adultery with Chris M Sevanick / Chris Exeris

On Jan 31, 2011, at 5:14, Ania Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

I read your journals because I was in love with you. I wanted to know everything about how brilliant you were. I was in awe of you. I am sorry this hurt you, as that was not my intention. I called Ross because I wanted a guys perspective, but also from someone who loved you because I wanted to give you the benefit of doubt. I wanted to understand you because I loved you. Same with the situation with your mom. She loves you and will always love you no matter what. I felt safe sharing my worries with her and did so from the perspective of someone who also loved you. I never cheated on you with Long. There was nothing at all physical that happened between us. As for Joel and Liz, yes I lied a lot. I am sorry. I did not mean to hurt you. I respect you and was and am remorseful. With time my interests began to change, and I made friends. I never said for you not to go to yoga or hooping with me. I do not like for anyone to be disrespected. Not me, not you, not my friends, not my family, not my coworkers. No one. I did not call your job and tell them you were suicidal. At yogaville, I told you not to visit because I was studying. You came and brought Shiro. You sat in the rain and made people worry for me thru your emails and behavior. I wasn’t talking to people about you. You sent the emails. You got people talking. I can only take so much. Eventually my emotions get the best of me and I begin to fall apart and then I finally talk for support, but not out of hate. You came to my job and the police came there. I talked about you at work as little as possible. Always out of love not hate. I do not want anyone to think you are a horrible person. I do not want to be in the middle of hate between anyone. I do not want to be around people that hate you.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

Pawel Tulin & Ania Ziolkowska Ania Anicca Pawel lied to me and stated he did not know them - See the Psytrance Cults Blog - Not realizing I already knew he was lying

Pawel Tulin & Ania Ziolkowska
Pawel lied to me and stated he did not know them – See the Psytrance Cults Blog

NO. Ania, like every sociopath, read my journals to learn how to pick me apart, control, and manipulate me. I was respectful enough to never read her journals, at least until after she left, and intentionally left them behind. Her leaving her journals behind, was like the protagonist in “Gone Girl”, another way to manipulate and still come off as the victim.

On Jan 31, 2011, at 3:50, Hector Barrientos-Bullcok <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Early 2001 you go through my things in my room and read things that are personal to me without permission from me. Sometime in 2002 you call Ross to ask him some personal questions concerning me instead of speaking with me about it like a rational person. Sometime in 2003, I let you go to the club with Long, Completely trusting you, and I find out after that you have a crush on your co-worker, Long. While that’s happening you tell others I am the problem, it’s all my fault. It’s all about you. Sometime in 2004, we meet Joel and Liz and YOU decide you want to have a lesbian experience with Liz. I point out that this is not a good idea and you try to go through with it anyway, making a further mess of our relationship. You LIE to me for a month about everything that occurred during this incident, including being in touch with Liz for that time. You establish at that time you are capable of lying without remorse and that you have absolutely no respect for me in any way. Multiple incidents after this, but sometime in 2005 you decide to talk to my mother about how I am supposedly a horrible person, while not realizing she has witnessed how horrible a person you are and how much patience I have had with you. Again, multiple incidents, but sometime in 2010 you choose to meet your new friends, you create incidents that have no reason to be as problematic as you make them but you choose to anyway, further illustrating your disrespect of me. Incident occurs over the summer after a canoeing trip with Brandon, Katie, and Angelina wherein you disrespect me, friends that are doing you a favor AND saving you money, then you punctuate that by further disrespecting me due to a mistake YOU made on the way home. You did again what you did with Joel and Liz, making a mistake, attempting to make me look at fault for your mistake, and then using the pity caused by that align yourself with people I initially took the initiative in meeting. Not able to make friends on your own HONESTLY, but able to steal the ones I make for US, DISHONESTLY. Again you messed up and ran to SOMEONE ELSE. 2010, you state you are not saying negative things about me, only for me to find out you are, then I demand a public apology, as I was sick of you embarrassing me publicly and you renege of that and also talk to people you told me you were not talking to. You go to marriage counseling, make an agreement, and then violate it immediately. You align yourself with someone I have had to hear from for years about how much you and his girlfriend look alike and had just recently confirmed want to be swingers. You call a friend in LA and destroy the vacation I had prepared for myself, my vacation from you, so I could get MY head sorted out, and then force me to go to PEX with you. You lose my apartment for me, you call my job and tell them I am suicidal, you create so much negativity I am pushed to my wits end and I have done nothing, NOTHING to deserve any of this treatment, whether it be the past years I have been more than patient with you, or whether it be the last few months. You tell your parents I have done things I have not done, you tell your friends a warped version of events (And then send me a BULLSHIT email 2 DAYS AGO about how it’s all perception. Facts are facts, and perception does not color facts.) You have an intimate encounter at PEX, in an environment any idiot could see was sexually charged, and then act as though I am just too thin skinned and I just need to get over it. You asked me questions in some previous emails?

Since you refuse to see reality as it is I will say this: YOU are too thin skinned. Get over it.

Couldn’t forget THIS one. It’s where Ania Ziolkowsia admits to trying to cheat on me with Elizabeth Stephens. She also lies about how she speaks about people, as you already know, and can see in the emails before this. Ania Ziolkowska is not capable of saying ONE HONEST THING.
By the time Ania Ziolkowska had written that email, she had had both a lesbian experience and threesome experience, adulterously, with Eva Annika Backstrom, and Uzi Grindler (More will come on those two, later), and had already begun her adulterous relationship with Chris Exeris (Christopher Michael Sevanick)

Also, Ania Ziolkowska would always tell me –

“You are too thin skinned.”

And, again, Ania Ziolkowska is LYING about calling my Job.
Denise Kane is willing to give a statement to this. Denise Kane was MY BOSS THAT ANIA CALLED AND TOLD I WAS SUICIDAL, which I WAS NOT AT THAT TIME. That came after all this. Ania Ziolkowska lies about not talking about me.

Email from Simon Padgham about her talking to him about divorce, but above she says she talked to NO ONE in YOGAVILLE about me –

Begin forwarded message:

From: Simon Padgham <simon@simonpadgham.com>

Date: September 6, 2010 10:03:22 AM EDT

To: annaziolko1@gmail.com

Subject: Hey Ania

Hi Ania,

How are you doing? I’m sorry that I didn’t get to say goodbye to you before you left Yogaville but I thought you were staying on for a few days. Anna and I came back late on Sunday and you’d already gone! So how are you doing? I hope you’ve managed to make all those big changes in your life that you were planning to do and things have been working out for you. Its always very hard to make such big changes and have the courage to walk away from things that may provide security, familiarity or safety but if you know deep down that they don’t serve you or that you don’t want them you have to do what is necessary to move on, grow and change. Otherwise you’re just going to stress yourself out massively, make yourself ill and be generally unhappy. Its hard to thrive, be at your best and reach your potential if you are working against yourself and compromising yourself I find. Still what you were planning to do requires courage, support and having to face many of fears. Have you talked to Anna at all? She has done what she intended to do and, despite continual stresses and problems, seems to be moving in the right direction for her. Maybe you should drop her a line? So are you going to come back here? There is lots to do and plenty of need for a lady of your talents! Michael mentioned that he had invited you back if you needed to return. Well, life here at Yogaville has been pretty good. The first few days after all you guys left was very strange for me. I felt pretty lonely and a bit down……but then so did Michael so I’m guessing that was a pretty normal thing to feel, especially after such an eventful and emotional month. I saw Satya today and she likened a place to a morgue last week!! So funny coming from her! I was quite busy and involved last week with the Taiwanese group which provided a nice distraction and kept me occupied. It was quite nice to sit in on their lectures and join them for morning practice. This week I have been doing the Structural Yoga Therapy course with Mukunda Stiles, which has been quite entertaining and eye opening. I have to admit I find all the A&P stuff very dry and I do tend to switch off when he does diagnostics and starts looking at people’s knees! He does talk a lot about Ayurveda and the Sutras though, which is more my thing. We finished the course on Friday and I then went to Charlottesville to pick up a rental car. I just want to be able to get about, go shopping and eat some different food every know and then. I am finding that I really need to eat some animal protein as I am feeling a bit weak and seem to be constantly hungry. My Ayurvedic doctor has told me to get some meat at all costs as soon as I can. I had thought about trying to snare the squirrels or deer hear but I don’t think that would go down too well! Only kidding! I’m going to keep the car for couple of weeks so Michael and I are planning a trip away for 4 or 5 days to the Outer Banks in NC. He loves it there and knows the place inside out so I’m happy to drive if he navigates and plans everything. Apparently he knows this great place to get freshly caught Yellow Fin tuna, which is supposed to be sublime. Sounds good to me. I imagine we’ll go next week or the week after, certainly in Sept and before the split TT starts…….which we are both involved in staffing for Swami Dyananda. The weather here is so much nicer now. The intense humidity and heat has gone and has been replaced with those lovely cool air. Its still beautifully sunny and hot but just no humidity. Its perfect for hiking and cycling, which I’ve been doing a lot of lately. Michael and I are off out this afternoon I think. He knows all the great places around here so I’m making use of his knowledge whilst I can before he leaves in early October! So I’d better get a move on an get ready. I’ve laundry and some major room cleaning to do before lunch. Anyway, you take care Ania. Namaste, Simon

One lie after the next.

Notice the date of THIS email and the dates of the others?

Notice how Ania Ziolkowska thought she could manipulate me even AFTER I already had all the facts?

That’s also a trait of AntiSocial Personality Disorder.

Even after her Yoga Teacher Training, Ania Ziolkowska still kept lying.

Ania Ziolkowska was violent with me.

Ania Ziolkowska had me sit her on a kitchen counter, so we could, I thought, TALK, and then proceeded to head butte me in the mouth, knocking out my front teeth, as she leaned back and smiled at her work.

And I never hit Ania Ziolkowksa.

I never touched her.

Ania Ziolkowska would begin physical fights, then, as I RESTRAINED her, she would say –

“I’ll call the police. You’re black and I’m a girl.”

Ania Ziolkowska is an Aries, by the Zodiac –

Ania Ziolkowska Ania Anicca is an Aries, by her birthday, which just happens to be April 1, 1976

Ania Ziolkowska is an Aries, by her birthday, which just happens to be April 1, 1976

(Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca has a terrible habit of having photos taken of her while she is high on Ecstasy)

I NEVER cheated on Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca , while it is obvious SHE commits adultery, FREELY
Again, high on E, at the Third Eye Rave, in Washington, DC, January 26, 2012

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca high on MDMA infecting our Siamese, Shiro
MDMA comes out through your pores and infects cats through their pores.

Eva Annika Backstrom high on MDMA

Annika Backstrom high on MDMA

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca high on MDMA infecting our Siamese, Shiro
MDMA comes out through your pores and infects cats through their pores.

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca thinks she’s a model when she’s high on MDMA

Below is Ania Plotting with her mother, while lying to me. You will have to run the text through google translate, as they thought I couldn’t translate the polish –

From: Gosia Ziolkowska <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>

Date: August 26, 2010 4:54:31 PM EDT

To: Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com>

Subject: Re: rozne

If you are both responsible for lease payment, if you leave and stop paying your share, he will have to pick up your share. If he does not and the apartament management does not receive the full monthly payment, they will make him move out. If he picks up your share and pays the full montly rent , he will stay and later if you decide to divorce, I am sure he will make you return the money, but it will be money you owe him and it will not break yur credit record. what if you write a statement and send it with registered mail and keep track of delivery and keep the original – a statement to the apartament management that you are not able to continue staying in the apartament for personal resons . The besst reason is if you have legal paper like restraining order or seperation papers. Please check what needs to be done, So many couples split, break lease etc , it has to be a way out. —

On Thu, 8/26/10, Ania<annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

From: Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com>

Subject: Re: rozne

To: “Gosia Ziolkowska” <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>

Date: Thursday, August 26, 2010, 3:17 PM

Wrzystko ok. Byłam w kinie z Kasią. Dzięki za troskę. Zadzwonie jutro.

On Aug 26, 2010, at 2:29 PM, Gosia Ziolkowska <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com> wrote:

jestesmy w domu czy mozesz zadzwonic na Mokotow Caly czas o tobie myslimy i rozmawiamy Zadzwon to Victorii. Ona mi powiedziala tydzien temu zebyscie dzwonily do niej jak problem. Kasia ma komorke Victorii i rowniez Hanki —

On Mon, 8/23/10, Ania<aniazmail@gmail.com> wrote:

From: Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com>

Subject: Re: rozne

To: “Gosia Ziolkowska” <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>

Date: Monday, August 23, 2010, 5:08 PM

Wrzyystko ok. Jestem w pracy. rozmawiam z Grzesiem.

On Aug 23, 2010, at 4:15 PM, Gosia Ziolkowska <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com> wrote:

Aniu, co slychac, gdzie mieszkasz czy bylas w pracy czy wszystko w porzadku wrocilismy wlasnie do domu —

On Sun, 8/22/10, Ania<annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

From: Ania <aniazmail@gmail.com>

Subject: Re: rozne

To: “Gosia Ziolkowska” <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>

Date: Sunday, August 22, 2010, 6:22 PM

Nie martw się. Będzie ok.

On Aug 22, 2010, at 5:57 PM, Gosia Ziolkowska <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com> wrote: —

On Sun, 8/22/10, Gosia Ziolkowska<gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>wrote:

From: Gosia Ziolkowska <gosiaziolkowska@yahoo.com>

Subject: rozne

To: annaziolko1@gmail.com

Date: Sunday, August 22, 2010, 5:51 PM

pisze tylko po polsku, bo moze on ma dostep do twojej poczty szukalam na google i jest duzo informacj napisz na google how to get restraining order in virginia i pisze jaka jest procedura jakie sa rodzaje orders na przyklad stalking/ abuse etc i jakie sa forms, gdzie to sie starac. dlatego powiedzialam ci zeby isc do shelter dla kobiet bo oni tam codziennie pomagaja i wiedza co zrobic i jak pomoc kobiecie nie ma co sie obrazac , bo sa ksiazki i filmy, ze to sie zdarza i kobieta ktora sie wstydzi isc nie dostanie pomocy. tu te services sa dobrze zorganizowane. Jesli planujesz Aniu wyjazd gdzie indziej tak jak do Polski , to pamietaj ,ze twoje 4 tygodnie podybu na obozie nic nie pomogly. trzeba najpierw zaczac cos robic , zeby czas na ciebie pracowal. jesli twoja decyzja jest wystapic o seperacje to zrob to przed wyjazdem. co do mieszkania to nie mam pojecia jak to zrobic i to trzeba sie dowiedziec. pozdrawiam bardzo sie o ciebie martwie

Ania Ziolkowska made such a mess of THIS one, I’ll let YOU figure it out, however, notice the cognitive dissonance, attempts at manipulation, the backtracking, and the “I can do it to you, but you can’t do it to me” mindset that is indicative of Antisocial and Narcissistic personality disorders.
And don’t be fooled by the flattery she offers. They do this in further attempts to manipulate their prey. –

———- Forwarded message ———-

From: Ania Ziolkowska <annaziolko69@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 1:56 PM
Subject: Re: relationship
To: HVBB Gmail <*******@gmail.com>

How is not cheating advers to trying to cheat? Both are not cheating. The only diff is that in one you accuse me of not doing something which I didn’t do. Were both agreeing that I didn’t cheat.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 19:22, HVBB Gmail <*********@gmail.com> wrote:

You are so self important you can’t even read what’s in front of you. I can put your response against the message you are responding to and it shows you blatantly tried to confuse the point, something you always do verbally, in writing this time. Why don’t you re-read the original message and see who you are REALLY calling a liar? Correct, I didn’t cheat, which is the adverse of you trying to many times. I compared you to me, and showed I was faithful while you were always disrespectful and self absorbed with no regard for anyone but you, but you state I am the one in search of a potty party for stating the facts? See how that works? See, you made yourself self important. You continue to make yourself self important and you also neglect to admit to facts you already admitted. Kirsten, Molly, Joel, Liz, Flight, and even Annika and Uzi all know you headbutted me in the mouth. You ADMITTED IT TO ANNIKA AND UZI. All the others listed were there when you did it.

This is another example of you attempting to edit facts.

Simple fact- the tooth was pushed down due to you headbutting me in the mouth, an action you never apologized for and smiled after you did it.

There is an X-ray to prove this.

This cause a root canal to have to occur. You made my perfectly straight teeth crooked. You went to another dentist to ask if he could knock it back up an straighten it.

YOU DID THiS ON YOUR OWN TO YOUR DENTIST.

The now dead tooth with a hole in it came out shortly after.

Those are the facts so get them straight.

I would still have a tooth of you had never headbutted me in the first place.

Not only did you do that and there are witnesses and evidence, but YOU created evidence by consulting more doctors.

Talk about trying to run away from your responsibilities….

On Feb 11, 2011, at 13:06, Anna Ziolkowska <aniazmail@gmail.com> wrote:

according to you insanity is saying you didnt cheat when you didnt cheat.

and you are calling me insane? and dont even try to say that i called pablo a liar. i do not need to go to him for anything.

the three of us as well as the owner of the restaurant know the truth. you are just fishing for pitty once again. get a backbone.

learn to rely on your own strength rather than building your house on other peoples weakneses. and you are the only one who thinks he is crazy and seems obsessed with proving to others that you are not. you never forced me to do anything, not even admitting to lying.

I didnt have to admit to anything, nor did i need to apologize, which i did both. i am not looking for you to accept my apology. you can only make peace with your own self.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:54 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

And in response to the cheating, you just sent an email last week that admitted ti how selfish you were concerning Joel and Liz, but attempt to retract that in this email?

Yes, that is insanity.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:43, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

Oh, and you don’t lie?????

Do not talk to me about lying, till you don’t yourself…

At least I admit to lying when I do and recognize it as a fault that I am working on. You on the other hand call me and as for me to lie for you, but then criticize me for lying.

Yes, i have lied to you for selfish reasons, but not with the intention of hurting you.

I have already admited to this, so this is not major discovery on your part.

As for your teeth, all I can say that Pablo was there, so he knows exectly what happened.

You think that just because you tell everyone something, that makes it so?

You and I both know the truth. You are wondering perhaps why you can’t find a job, and why you have other problems???

Karma.

TRIED to cheat on you?????

Get real!

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:36 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Again you don’t see reality for what it is.

That is psychosis.

You went to marriage counseling and then backtracked on your agreement – FACT.

You lied and have admitted to lying (you really should read your previous emails before writing these responses or at least improve your memory, which is hard to do being a compulsive liar) – FACT

YOU left to Poland, lying the entire time before going and while there-FACT, proven by YOUR OWN WRITING

You were violent to me, knocking out my teeth-FACT

You tried to cheat several times and constantly pushed me away-WITNESSED FACTS.

You really have walked over the edge when you compose a message such the one you just did while ignoring even THOSE SIMPLE FACTS and there are SO MANY MORE that are verifiable and proveable. Maybe you should read this, then re-read what you wrote and then MAYBE you might see reality for what it is.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:26, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

> Why do you speak as though I can do something to salvage our relationship. You are the one who has called me a liar and has sent me away with your words.

I threw my things out of the apartment, and have locked me out on multiple occasions, not the other way around.

This shows that you dont want me as a wife. I was too deaf to hear it.

You contacted my friends family and coworkers to tell them what a terrible person I was according to you, so you do not want me as a wife.

So there is not me coming back to you. Coming back on what terms?

You are the one who doesnt want me. It is not my fault that i am not there right now. I was finally respecting your words.

———- Forwarded message ———-

From: Hector Barrientos-Bullcok <********@gmail.com>

Date: Wed, Mar 16, 2011 at 7:46 AM

Subject: Fwd: relationship

To: anniqq@gmail.com, grandbleu@gmail.com, kandykidd13@gmail.com

The 3 of you know the incident in question but apparently the person who actually did it lives in psychosis. So, does that mean that all that crap that happened years ago, the reason we ever met Kirsten in the 1st place, suddenly didn’t happen?

Go figure.

———- Forwarded message ———-

From: Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com>

Date: Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 2:40 PM

Subject: Re: relationship

To: HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com>

You are attacking my emotional stability and memory by saying I tried to cheat?

What else did I TRY to do???

If I had WANTED to cheat on you, I would have.

You are really fishing for drama and sympathy.

Is your addiction to drama this intense that you would rather not have a wife than a made up dramatic relationship?

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Feb 11, 2011, at 20:17, HVBB Gmail <hvbbmail@gmail.com> wrote:

Wrong again.

You made an effort that I never did and then you try to say I was the one that pushed YOU away when you tried to cheat LONG before I ever got sour. Your treatment of me AND your attempts to cheat are what MADE me sour in the first place.

Cause and effect.

You refuse to acknowledge basic logic and physics.

But that is no surprise.

Logic comes from emotion.

The fact you cannot fathom logic shows your lack of emotion.

To use a fictional character, the vulcans are highly logical, but ALSO highly emotional.

They combat for emotional control all the time. Memory also comes from the emotional attachment one places on events and facts. This has been proven via study. You have a poor, actually horrible, memory. What does that say about grasp of emotional ability?

On Feb 11, 2011, at 13:56, Ania Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

How is not cheating advers to trying to cheat? Both are not cheating. The only diff is that in one you accuse me of not doing something which I didn’t do. Were both agreeing that I didn’t cheat.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 19:22, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

You are so self important you can’t even read what’s in front of you.

I can put your response against the message you are responding to and it shows you blatantly tried to confuse the point, something you always do verbally, in writing this time.

Why don’t you re-read the original message and see who you are REALLY calling a liar?

Correct, I didn’t cheat, which is the adverse of you trying to many times.

I compared you to me, and showed I was faithful while you were always disrespectful and self absorbed with no regard for anyone but you, but you state I am the one in search of a potty party for stating the facts?

See how that works?

See, you made yourself self important. You continue to make yourself self important and you also neglect to admit to facts you already admitted.

Kirsten, Molly, Joel, Liz, Flight, and even Annika and Uzi all know you headbutted me in the mouth.

You ADMITTED IT TO ANNIKA AND UZI.

All the others listed were there when you did it.

This is another example of you attempting to edit facts.

Simple fact– the tooth was pushed down due to you headbutting me in the mouth, an action you never apologized for and smiled after you did it.

There is an X-ray to prove this.

This cause a root canal to have to occur. You made my perfectly straight teeth crooked.

You went to another dentist to ask if he could knock it back up an straighten it.

YOU DID THIS ON YOUR OWN TO YOUR DENTIST.

The now dead tooth with a hole in it came out shortly after.

Those are the facts so get them straight.

I would still have a tooth of you had never headbutted me in the first place.

Not only did you do that and there are witnesses and evidence, but YOU created evidence by consulting more doctors.

Talk about trying to run away from your responsibilities….

On Feb 11, 2011, at 13:06, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

according to you insanity is saying you didnt cheat when you didnt cheat. and you are calling me insane?

and dont even try to say that i called pablo a liar. i do not need to go to him for anything. the three of us as well as the owner of the restaurant know the truth.

you are just fishing for pitty once again.

get a backbone.

learn to rely on your own strength rather than building your house on other peoples weakneses. and you are the only one who thinks he is crazy and seems obsessed with proving to others that you are not.

you never forced me to do anything, not even admitting to lying.

I didnt have to admit to anything, nor did i need to apologize, which i did both.

i am not looking for you to accept my apology. you can only make peace with your own self.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:54 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

And in response to the cheating, you just sent an email last week that admitted to how selfish you were concerning Joel and Liz, but attempt to retract that in this email?

Yes, that is insanity.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:43, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

Oh, and you don’t lie?????

Do not talk to me about lying, till you don’t yourself…

At least I admit to lying when I do and recognize it as a fault that I am working on. You on the other hand call me and as for me to lie for you, but then criticize me for lying.

Yes, i have lied to you for selfish reasons, but not with the intention of hurting you.

I have already admited to this, so this is not major discovery on your part.

As for your teeth, all I can say that Pablo was there, so he knows exectly what happened. You think that just because you tell everyone something, that makes it so? You and I both know the truth. You are wondering perhaps why you can’t find a job, and why you have other problems???

Karma. TRIED to cheat on you????? Get real!

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:36 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Again you don’t see reality for what it is.

That is psychosis.

You went to marriage counseling and then backtracked on your agreement – FACT.

You lied and have admitted to lying (you really should read your previous emails before writing these responses or at least improve your memory, which is hard to do being a compulsive liar) – FACT

YOU left to Poland, lying the entire time before going and while there – FACT, proven BY YOUR OWN WRITING

You were violent to me, knocking out my teeth-FACT

You tried to cheat several times and constantly pushed me away – WITNESSED FACTS.

You really have walked over the edge when you compose a message such the one you just did while ignoring even THOSE SIMPLE FACTS and there are SO MANY MORE that are verifiable and proveable.

Maybe you should read this, then re-read what you wrote and then MAYBE you might see reality for what it is.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:26, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

> Why do you speak as though I can do something to salvage our relationship. You are the one who has called me a liar and has sent me away with your words.

I threw my things out of the apartment, and have locked me out on multiple occasions, not the other way around.

This shows that you dont want me as a wife. I was too deaf to hear it.

You contacted my friends family and coworkers to tell them what a terrible person I was according to you, so you do not want me as a wife.

So there is not me coming back to you. Coming back on what terms?

You are the one who doesnt want me. It is not my fault that i am not there right now.

I was finally respecting your words. Why don’t you re-read what you wrote and then try that again?

Or, how about this:

On Feb 11, 2011, at 19:22, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

See, you made yourself self important.

You continue to make yourself self important and you also neglect to admit to facts you already admitted.

Kirsten, Molly, Joel, Liz, Flight, and even Annika and Uzi all know you headbutted me in the mouth.

You ADMITTED IT TO ANNIKA AND UZI.

All the others listed were there when you did it.

This is another example of you attempting to edit facts.

Simple fact– the tooth was pushed down due to you headbutting me in the mouth, an action you never apologized for and smiled after you did it. There is an X-ray to prove this.

This cause a root canal to have to occur. You made my perfectly straight teeth crooked.

You went to another dentist to ask if he could knock it back up an straighten it. YOU DID THIS ON YOUR OWN TO YOUR DENTIST.

The now dead tooth with a hole in it came out shortly after. Those are the facts so get them straight. I would still have a tooth of you had never headbutted me in the first place.

Not only did you do that and there. Are witnesses and evidence, but YOU created evidence by consulting more doctors. Talk about trying to run away from your responsibilities….

See how you attempted to ignore those facts to attempt to twist this to your favor as you always do?

they were listed, but because they were provable you ignored them and therefore decided to just attempt to backtrack onto the Pablo issue instead.

You will ignore this again, because it doesn’t support the reality you are attempting to create, but it’s provable none the less.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 5:28 PM, Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

I am speaking for myself saying he was there when your tooth came out. I am not putting any words into his mouth, and therefore, am not speaking for him.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Feb 11, 2011, at 23:22, Hector Barrientos-Bullcok <********@gmail.com> wrote:

You spoke for him by attempting to say what he saw when.

That is speaking FOR someone.

Or should I cut and paste that message as well since you are too lazy to read over what you wrote before attempting to retract it.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 5:13 PM, Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

I was not speaking for Pablo. I said he can speak for himself. I said he was there.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Feb 11, 2011, at 23:05, Hector Barrientos-Bullcok <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Funny, because I do believe you were trying to speak for Pablo, someone the does not like you.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 4:35 PM, Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

Let people speak for themselves.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Feb 11, 2011, at 22:33, Hector Barrientos-Bullcok <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Funny how you had a lot to say when you thought you could turn it to pity for yourself but nothing to say when the facts state you are actually the one at fault, when you are actually the unstable one.

The only person wishing to live in DRAMA is YOU, as it always has been, witnessed by so many you separated yourself from them because you KNEW you shat where you ate.

Now you try to say they are all crazy, and they never saw you act the way you did.

This is called psychosis. You fall back on Pablo?

He despises you.

He has SEEN how you treated me and he thinks you are absolutely insane.

Do you really think he would LIE for you?

I sincerely doubt that, so stop trying to speak for Pablo.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 3:10 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Let’s talk about me needing to sleep and you following me from the bedroom to the loving room to the bedroom over and over again, turning on lights, pulling blankets off of me, yelling at me, kicking me, hitting me, all because I was trying to sleep.

Then, when I finally locked the bedroom door and said “let me go to sleep or I’m tossing your clothes out the window”, you kicked in the door.

Really?

That’s rational behaviour?

You did all of this at 218 E Mason, more than once, I may add.

So don’t you even think about attempting to point fingers or try to name call as to who the drama causer was.

It’s ALWAYS been YOU.

Always looking to bully or control.

And I guarantee you won’t have anything to say to this because there is no way you can even TRY to turn it around as you have attempted to do with everything else.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 14:43, Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

I’m not even gonna bring up me getting locked out, and then you not letting me back in even though you had keys.

I’m referring to about a dozen or more situations where you locked the door and wouldn’t let me into our apartment.

Tell me those didn’t happen.

Go ahead.

You yourself said it takes me a while to figure things out. Well, here’s my delayed reaction. You wanted me out, now I am out.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Feb 11, 2011, at 20:20, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Me me me me me me me.

You LEFT, remember?

Get it right.

You left both emotionally AND physically.

And if I remember correctly, you locked YOURSELF out and then ORDERED me, who was out with you, to let you back in.

You didn’t ask, you ORDERED.

That’s pretty disrespectful.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 13:58, Ania Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

You said I was disrespectful. And what do you call locking your wife out of your joint apartment???!!!! Answer that!

On Feb 11, 2011, at 19:22, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

You are so self important you can’t even read what’s in front of you.

I can put your response against the message you are responding to and it shows you blatantly tried to confuse the point, something you always do verbally, in writing this time.

Why don’t you re-read the original message and see who you are REALLY calling a liar?

Correct, I didn’t cheat, which is the adverse of you trying to many times. I compared you to me, and showed I was faithful while you were always disrespectful and self absorbed with no regard for anyone but you, but you state I am the one in search of a potty party for stating the facts?

See how that works?

See, you made yourself self important. You continue to make yourself self important and you also neglect to admit to facts you already admitted. Kirsten, Molly, Joel, Liz, Flight, and even Annika and Uzi all know you headbutted me in the mouth.

You ADMITTED IT TO ANNIKA AND UZI.

All the others listed were there when you did it. This is another example of you attempting to edit facts. Simple fact- the tooth was pushed down due to you headbutting me in the mouth, an action you never apologized for and smiled after you did it.

There is an X-ray to prove this.

This cause a root canal to have to occur. You made my perfectly straight teeth crooked. You went to another dentist to ask if he could knock it back up an straighten it.

YOU DID THIS ON YOUR OWN TO YOUR DENTIST.

The now dead tooth with a hole in it came out shortly after.

Those are the facts so get them straight.

I would still have a tooth of you had never headbutted me in the first place.

Not only did you do that and there. Are witnesses and evidence, but YOU created evidence by consulting more doctors.

Talk about trying to run away from your responsibilities….

On Feb 11, 2011, at 13:06, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

according to you insanity is saying you didnt cheat when you didnt cheat. and you are calling me insane? and dont even try to say that i called pablo a liar. i do not need to go to him for anything.

the three of us as well as the owner of the restaurant know the truth. you are just fishing for pitty once again. get a backbone.

learn to rely on your own strength rather than building your house on other peoples weakneses. and you are the only one who thinks he is crazy and seems obsessed with proving to others that you are not.

you never forced me to do anything, not even admitting to lying.

I didnt have to admit to anything, nor did i need to apologize, which i did both. i am not looking for you to accept my apology. you can only make peace with your own self.

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:54 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

And in response to the cheating, you just sent an email last week that admitted ti how selfish you were concerning Joel and Liz, but attempt to retract that in this email?

Yes, that is insanity.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:43, Anna Ziolkowska <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

Oh, and you don’t lie????? Do not talk to me about lying, till you don’t yourself… At least I admit to lying when I do and recognize it as a fault that I am working on. You on the other hand call me and as for me to lie for you, but then criticize me for lying.

Yes, i have lied to you for selfish reasons, but not with the intention of hurting you. I have already admited to this, so this is not major discovery on your part. As for your teeth, all I can say that Pablo was there, so he knows exectly what happened. You think that just because you tell everyone something, that makes it so? You and I both know the truth. You are wondering perhaps why you can’t find a job, and why you have other problems???

Karma. TRIED to cheat on you?????

Get real!

On Fri, Feb 11, 2011 at 6:36 PM, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

Again you don’t see reality for what it is. That is psychosis.

You went to marriage counseling and then backtracked on your agreement – FACT.

You lied and have admitted to lying (you really should read your previous emails before writing these responses or at least improve your memory, which is hard to do being a compulsive liar) – FACT

YOU left to Poland, lying the entire time before going and while there-FACT, proven by YOUR OWN WRITING

You were violent to me, knocking out my teeth-FACT

You tried to cheat several times and constantly pushed me away-WITNESSED FACTS.

You really have walked over the edge when you compose a message such the one you just did while ignoring even THOSE SIMPLE FACTS and there are SO MANY MORE that are verifiable and proveable.

Maybe you should read this, then re-read what you wrote and then MAYBE you might see reality for what it is.

On Feb 11, 2011, at 12:26, Anna Ziolkowska <annazioko1@gmail.com> wrote:

> Why do you speak as though I can do something to salvage our relationship. You are the one who has called me a liar and has sent me away with your words.

I threw my things out of the apartment, and have locked me out on multiple occasions, not the other way around.

This shows that you dont want me as a wife. I was too deaf to hear it. You contacted my friends family and coworkers to tell them what a terrible person I was according to you, so you do not want me as a wife.

So there is not me coming back to you.

Coming back on what terms? You are the one who doesnt want me. It is not my fault that i am not there right now. I was finally respecting your words.

THIS is who Ania Ziolkowska really is – Here is another Ania Ziolkowska tactic. She will ensure the email she is responding to is not in the email history, as though the history does not exist on the other end. This is a form of gas lighting via digital medium :

On Oct 27, 2010, at 10:01, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

I’m just forwarding YOUR email, so who looks crazier?

The one that lied and then shows they lied in their own words or the one that let’s everyone know they were lied to?

I don’t care either way. You painted a picture of me being crazy BEFORE the emails were sent.

You only don’t realize this because you lime to play with timelines to support your lies.

That’s why I also have an email from you that says to forget the timeline.

Your lies fall apart under scrutiny and chronological order.

So none of these people had any intention of getting the real story or they would have made an effort to meet me and I don’t care how I look in front of hypocrites.

They look worse by definition.

They are no one to me as I am no one to them.

I should care about how I look WHY, again?

On Oct 27, 2010, at 9:51, Ania <annaziolko1@gmail.com> wrote:

Nothing I do would make you look crazier than the emails which you yourself have sent out. What one says about another is an opinion, what one does oneself can’t be disputed. I am not dying the emails make you look crazy, because that is not my place to judge, but just think about this.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Oct 26, 2010, at 21:58, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

It is because you have shown a history of saying one thing to ME, but saying the OPPOSITE to EVERYONE else, so I am covering myself due to having become tired of being made to look “crazy” by you.

I am sorry, but that is the price of “the boy who cried wolf” method you have been using.

You may become angry in seeing this, but you may want to “put yourself in MY shoes.” When toughening yourself from the emotion of being “embarrassed” you may see that I am justified in doing this.

-Hector

The email that followed –

On Oct 27, 2010, at 10:43, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

It’s also funny it took you 3 days to get to this but only about 5 minutes to get back to your friends.

Something to be said there.

Next time I will follow my OWN instincts….

On Oct 27, 2010, at 9:51, Ania <aniazmail@gmail.com> wrote:

Nothing I do would make you look crazier than the emails which you yourself have sent out.

What one says about another is an opinion, what one does oneself can’t be disputed. I am not dying the emails make you look crazy, because that is not my place to judge, but just think about this.

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Oct 26, 2010, at 21:58, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

It is because you have shown a history of saying one thing to ME, but saying the OPPOSITE to EVERYONE else, so I am covering myself due to having become tired of being made to look “crazy” by you.

I am sorry, but that is the price of “the boy who cried wolf” method you have been using.

You may become angry in seeing this, but you may want to “put yourself in MY shoes.” When toughening yourself from the emotion of being “embarrassed” you may see that I am justified in doing this.

-Hector

The email that followed THAT –

On Oct 27, 2010, at 16:27, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

And now we step into Ania world, where the facts and actions of the people around her are in NO WAY an indication of any action she may have taken.

And let’s not forget his friends are so intelligent they do not tell in themselves and therefore tell on her as well. Aren’t the rest of us happy we do not live in Ania world?

Yes.

Yes we are.

On Oct 27, 2010, at 10:15, Ania <annnazioko1@gmail.com> wrote:

You do not know that.

What if in fact I do not tell people that you are crazy, but that instead you have made yourself look crazy due to your emails?

What if in fact I tell everyone that we have a normal relationship with ups and downs, and then you go forwarding my nice emails to you to all of my family and friends attempting to show them that in fact they are proof that I am crazy and a liar.

Who looks crazy in the end? I do not want my friends and family thinking you are crazy!

I am married to you.

Either way I love you.

Are you at work?

Sent from Ania’s iPad

On Oct 26, 2010, at 21:58, HVBB Gmail <********@gmail.com> wrote:

It is because you have shown a history of saying one thing to ME, but saying the OPPOSITE to EVERYONE else, so I am covering myself due to having become tired of being made to look “crazy” by you.

I am sorry, but that is the price of “the boy who cried wolf” method you have been using.

You may become angry in seeing this, but you may want to “put yourself in MY shoes.” When toughening yourself from the emotion of being “embarrassed” you may see that I am justified in doing this.

-Hector

See how she attempts to manipulate, even via a date stamped email?

THIS is NOT “Satya”.

I should have done this YEARS ago.

You now know you cannot believe a WORD SHE SAYS, VIA HER OWN WORDS. And there’s still text messages and voice recordings.

That’s when it gets REAL interesting.

Yama #2 Satya (santoshayogadenver.wordpress.com)
Satya (chroniclesofmyogajourney.wordpress.com)
Identifying Individuals with Antisocial Personality Disorder Using Resting-State fMRI (plosone.org)
Surprising Myths & Facts About Antisocial Personality Disorder (psychcentral.com)
Antisocial personality disorder: the hidden epidemic (oup.com)

Psytrance Cultism – Herd Mentality: The “Hive Mind”

December 27, 2013June 25, 2016 / neonplasticlotus / 2 Comments

Recently there has been a war concerning Ania Ziolkowska and Chris Exeris Sevanick.
It seems that their recent trip to Poland has “emboldened” them, makes them feel “untouchable”
Or, more accurately, they are probably running into opposition, socially, in Poland, and do not want to recognize that it is their own personalities are to blame.

So, lately, they have taken to a campaign of reporting every single little post they can on facebook, attempting to protect their “image”
This is ironic, as they actually have no real personality of their own. They have a manufactured image they have compiled from their interactions with others.
They’re incapable of ever knowing their true selves –

“NARCISSISTS ARE PEOPLE WHO never learned to make it on their own. Except for their fantasies of perfection, envy of others who have what they lack, and unacknowledged fears of humiliation, they are empty on the inside. They have no real Self to bring to a relationship with another person, but they desperately need someone else to join them in their emptiness and help them maintain emotional equilibrium. The ideal candidate is someone willing to become an extension of the Narcissist’s fragile ego, to serve as an object of admiration, contempt, or often enough both. The sign over their door ought to read: Abandon Self All Ye Who Enter Here.”

– Hotchkiss (pg. 121)

An example of their current debacle of narcissism is this very public display of attempted character assassination –

He doesn’t like drama, but he makes this post?
Narcissists are DRAMA QUEENS

Really?
This isn’t drama?

The hypocrisy alone, in this entire display is nothing less than hilarious.

“People need to get on with their own lives, instead of worrying about others…..”

Then…..WHY ARE YOU PARTICIPATING IN THIS????

The thing that is prevalent in cults, and narcissists, besides their toxic vitriol, is the fact they project.
They do EXACTLY what they call out in other people as “wrong”, yet somehow do not see THEY ARE DOING PRECISELY THE SAME THING THEMSELVES.

And let’s not forget how the lying and duplicitous drama king himself, Chris “Exeris” Sevanick, chimes in his two cents.

Let’s clear some things up, as, it is obvious they believe the lies Chris Sevanick and Ania Ziolkowska have fed them –

1. Ania Ziolkowska is my WIFE. We are still married, as she freely admitted in the linked conversation. And she ran to Poland to keep from having to pay damages in a divorce.

Remember “Collective Narcissism” (Herd Mentality)?
Well, here you go.
And thank you for believing I can affect the future of Grains of Sound

I cannot affect the fate of Grains of Sound, Chris Sevanick’s failing side project, though I will admit I am flattered they believe I can.
The only one that can affect it’s fate is Chris Exeris, and he’s doing just fine on his own in ensuring it will go nowhere (that will be addressed in another blog)
Chris Sevanick resents that I have been able to achieve more attention with my blogs and posts than he has been able to in the EIGHT YEARS he has been doing Grains of Sound.

There’s a conversation with Kaliptus Ohm that will be the subject of the next entry in the series, where he’s asked to just ask Chris Sevanick for the original of the conversation featured in the “Id-the Ego of Maya” blog, however, he merely continues to call me a liar, rather than verify the truth.

Then he just removed the post entirely.

They don’t want to know reality.
Then they would be wrong.
And, as we previously discussed, a narcissist can never be wrong.

Chris Exeris Sevanick isn’t a bad guy? Really?
We should look at the “Id – The ego of Maya” blog to confirm that.

Grains of Sound - your future is in my hands......apparently

Because Putting Ohm at the end of your name, and then doing what you just said you hated isn’t hypocritical at all………….Grains of Sound – your future is in my hands……apparently

Psytrance Cultism : Pawel “ArThou” Tulin – Demonstration of Collective Narcissism

August 18, 2013July 12, 2017 / neonplasticlotus / 28 Comments

On Aug 14, 2013, at 18:48, “Pawel Tulin” <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Dude – to start with – you are officially band from Poland forever, do not ever go there because you will never come back unless in body bag, and I promise you that

Hector Virgilio Barrientos-Bullock <*********@xxx.com> Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 7:01 PM

To: “<ptulin@gmail.com>” <ptulin@gmail.com>

Cc: Chris Exeris <Alterculture@gmail.com>

Oh my?

You control an entire country now?

Interesting.

I do believe there’s this thing called international relations.

You might want to look it up.

I’m sorry….seriously….hold on…:..I need to catch my breath.

My stomach hurts from laughing so much.

I’m not kidding.

Poland would not risk and international incident over your collective asinine egos.

I really had no desire at all to go there, but am now considering it, JUST to laugh in your face.

I’ll have to get back to you after I’m done laughing.

I’ve already had to correct 12 typos from typing while laughing.

Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!

That was too good!!!

Oh lord…..

Okay( what else have you in your back of delusions, oh lord and master magician?

Sent from my iPhone

Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 7:05 PM

Reply-To: ptulin@gmail.com

To: Hector Virgilio Barrientos-Bullock <hectorbmail@xxx.com>

Cc: Chris Exeris <Alterculture@gmail.com>

You bet – I do control that country, more than you ever know – and few others – want to challenge me? I’ll buy you a ticket

Welcome to the first installment of a continuing series on Psytrance Cultism!!!
As usual, there are hyperlinks that explain terms, so follow them to have a complete understanding.
I had been hoping to complete the Vipassana Cultism series, however, due to email issues, as well as the providence of the above conversation landing in my lap, I felt it was time to put that to the back burner, for just a moment, and address a growing problem:

The misuse of Psytrance and Psytrance culture to become cultish Collective Narcissism.

It’s the “Heather’s” or “Mean Girls” of the EDM (Electronic Dance Music) community.

Luis Campos, 2nd from the left, Chris “Exeris” Sevanick, far left.
This is PsychGround.
These people should NEVER reproduce.

We will focus mostly on a “collective” (pun intended) known as PyscheGround (and some members of EastCoast Psytribe), in New York City, though there may be a few diversions that reach as far as Colorado, Germany, and Poland. As you will see by the comments and discussions listed, these people are true Narcissistic Personality Disorders.

Legends in their OWN minds.

Now, before we go any further, it should be made clear that I followed psytrance as far back as when I was in the Navy, based out of Yokosuka, Japan, aboard the USS Independence CV62, way back in 1995, having been introduced to it by a “girl” friend named “Victoria”. At that time, psytrance was known as ” Goa Trance“, was artful, creative, technical, and made up of an actually caring community.

That is not what psytrance is NOW.

What prompted this series, besides a multitude of reasons, is an article I saw posted a few months ago about how psytrance was the

“Religion that has no name….”

When I saw and read this article……well, before I say anything, let me provide an excerpt –

“It is, essentially, a ‘New Religious Movement’ (NRM) that is not allowed to become an organised religion. It cannot be given a name, nor can its places of communal gathering be made to explicit. It includes a great variety of belief and practice: but then the religions of Hinduism and Buddhism, even Christianity all show a great variety of forms and expressions also. It has it’s own set of texts, but none are adopted as dogma, there is no cannon: but then many of the historical forms of human spirituality did not have a cannon either. It even has its own unique forms of artistic expression and aesthetic style, rife with themes of transcendence and spiritual discovery.”

Firstly, when did popping psychedelic drugs and listening to “sub”-corporate music, become a “religious movement”???? It’s places of gathering cannot be made explicit? They post all over the internet when a show or festival is happening, they take pictures, they charge admission, they promote DJs and producers!!!!

I believe if a church did this, we would call it a SCAM, or a CULT.

But, let us visit upon that later, shall we? We do have a purpose to this PARTICULAR blog entry, after all……. It includes a great variety of practices? Maybe it does, however, not one of them understand a SINGLE ONE of those practices anywhere NEAR completely. And we shall demonstrate that as we proceed. It has it’s own sacred texts? What texts are these? A “bible” of blotter LSD? There were no “Sacred Texts” in 1995, or in the 70s, when this genre began, nor are there NOW. But no adopted dogma? I am willing to wager that as we watch this series unfold, we will learn there IS an adopted dogma, and that “dogma” is “Spiritual Narcissism”, practiced in the form of COLLECTIVE NARCISSISM. Unique forms of artistic expression?

It’s MUSIC!!! Of COURSE it’s “artistic” and “expressionistic”!!!

Though the “Unique” is debatable. You’ll have to REALLY DIG to find THAT. Let us take a quote from a German friend, via Frankfurt, the city of my birth (Please don’t mind the language difference) –

June 14
11:06am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma So, it’s sub-underground, as it is everywhere. I’ll be honest, with the mentality of the people I have seen in the psytrance scene, I pretty much see it as a virus that needs be innoculated against. They have no empathy and no sense of anyone but themselves and their cultish community. I have conversations with psytrance heads that illustrate this, and it has become more prevalent in the last 5 years. And I used to be part of that scene, until I saw that and became victim to it. They’re a bunch of pleasure seeking sociopaths.
11:07am

Flow Yo word.

it’s exactly the same as in germany -.-

that’s the reason why i don’t go to events like this anymore…
11:08am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma So, it IS a virus that spreads across that community. I felt as much.
11:08am

Flow Yo and you have dumb people with many drugs in their blood
11:08am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma I must ask, may I use your comments in a blog I am writing on this subject?
11:09am

Flow Yo yeah, you can.
11:09am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Thank you. That helps a lot.
11:09am

Flow Yo and you have some dumbass-vegetarians, that are shouting their message all over the place…

erm, not “some”, many!

and all this shit of pseudo-deep people
11:09am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma That’s ironic, as, due to Monsanto, the vegetables they eat actually have animal genes spliced into them.
11:10am

Flow Yo nothing real psychedelic, open minded thinkers, philosophers, dumb style-people as everywhere

after “philosophers” should be a full-stop.
11:10am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Wow. This virus has spread to Europe. However I’ve noticed it’s predominantly EASTERN Europe, And I wonder why that is…..
11:11am

Flow Yo it’s a pity, but yeah, you can’t keep the dumb people out.
11:11am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma The “dumb people” seem to have become the “normal” people. And that’s scary.
11:11am

Flow Yo i think it’s because of some kind of narcistic. internet, the people think, if they dress like that, listen to that kind of music and eat vegetarian, they’d be a better person and so deep

yeah, this is true…
11:12am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma I think you are correct.
11:12am

Flow Yo that they are dumb and closed mind is the fact, i think

and they don’t have no idea of good music often
11:12am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma While saying they are actually more open minded than others. And that is the complete irony of it.
11:12am

Flow Yo end never felt, what problems and chaos is like. they’re just kids

yeah..
11:13am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Sadly, many of them are over 40 years old.
11:13am

Flow Yo eeek..
11:14am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Yes.
11:14am

Flow Yo and they’re such scene fascists
11:14am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma I’m sorry. I really want to continue this, but I have to go. And I really do want to continue this, as you are providing a very relevant view.
11:14am

Flow Yo hey, i hear so many music, go to so many different parties, scenes, communitys… i’m kind of exotic, i think. where i go, i see people, just living in their own little habitats.
11:15am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Yes. I do the same. In many groups but part of none.
11:16am

Flow Yo okay, we will continue sometimes, i hope. have fun at whatever you do and have a nice weekend! and keep strong, and keep in mind they’re just a bunch of afraid childs. afraid to stand alone, on their own feets and realize they’re nothing but implanted ideologies and ideas!
11:17am

Shiva Bodhi Dharma We will. I’ll hit you up sometime this weekend.
11:18am

Flow Yo and thx for the name pollock, i’m reading very interested his bio.
(Author’s note: He is an artist in Germany, and therefore had never heard of Jackson Pollock, therefore I directed him to him, for inspiration…..)

There are MANY such conversations I have been given permission to use in this series, not all from him, but many others, though the Germans DO seem to be the most outspoken, and, as shall be seen, they all say, in their own ways, the exact same thing –

Psytrance seems composed of mostly Spiritual Narcissists

Now, once again, the stage is set, the scenario defined, and thus, we come to our first “player”, if you will…….

Pawel Tulin

Degree in Psychology, User Experience software designer, Polish Psytrance Ego Maniac. Observe –

7:25pm

Shiva Bodhi Dharma maybe……You do realize I have issues with the Arthous right now, right? Due to hiding that Chris Sevanick was fucking my wife, while partying right next to me, for nearly a year, right? Not saying I’m adverse to a meeting, just putting that out there.

And yes, Ania Ziolkowska or Ziolko, is the woman I have been talking about for nearly two years. The abusive gold digger.

So, just want to put that out there, before, you know.
7:56pm

Pawel ArThou sorry to hear that but I was out of the scene for at least two years, exactly for the reason that this psy scene is bit fucked up for me. So even if I share the name with them, I have not seen any of them at least for two years. I am keeping the name for sentimental reason. Hope you get it

Pawel Tulin & Ania Ziolkowska
Pawel lied to me and stated he did not know them – See the Psytrance Cults Blog

Now, as can be seen, while Pawel Tulin was believing he was successfully deceiving me in stating he had not seen anyone from the “ArThou” swinger group for two years, he was hanging out with MY adulterous wife, and Chris “Exeris” Sevanick, nearly every day. I already knew this. And this makes a point that is not only indicative of Pawel, but of everyone in this New York City Psytrance “Community” –

They believe they are smarter than anyone else they encounter.

This is another symptom of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, bordering on Anti Social Personality Disorder. It seems these traits are prevalent among cultists.

However, what can we expect, from someone that says something such as this? –

From: “Pawel Tulin” <ptulin@gmail.com>
Date: May 16, 2013, 17:37:02 EDT
To: “‘Hector Barrientos-Bullock'” <hvbbmail@xxx.com>
Subject: RE: I never did
Reply-To: <ptulin@gmail.com>

I don’t want to waste my time on bullshit. I don’t know what dhamma is but I
feel it. Especially, I don’t have time for your petty shit. Do what you
want, I’ll see you on the other side. You can thank me later, if there is
any need for it any after…

Do we remember the line of how none of them understand any of the practices they have adopted completely?

Well, there you go.

Let us include the entire email exchange the first lines of this first article of the series originated from.
It should be noted that I am merely laying out rope for Pawel, length by length, waiting for him to do what is to be done with rope, as we all know.
There are many conversations such as this, and they will be included in future entries to this series, however, this one was such a god send that I had to change my blog schedule to get this out to the masses, for all to see how the minds of the psytrance acolytes have warped all sense of reality, and call it “spiritual”.

Yes, it’s highly personal, however, well…..just look at his “Dhamma” line.

It speaks for itself……

The exchange –

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 2:33 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Listen – take me off this bullshit you doing or I will sue you myself little man

From: Hector Barrientos-Bullock [mailto:hectorbmail@xxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 14, 2013 2:38 PM
To: ptulin@gmail.com
Subject: Re: Figure it out yet?

Please sue.

I’m curious – what statute do you believe you will be utilizing?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 2:44 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Harassment, slander, stocking, I have all the copies of your emails, you are an asshole. If you ever end up with her in court, I will testify against you, you piece of shit. You are a fuckin moron and disgrace to humanity. Go kill yourself and save all of us an effort. Also – you are a joke in our community, most people put your fricking email on automatic delete including Ania and Chris, and others are saying you are an asshole who will never be welcome back to burners and psy. So get the grip and move on. Or if you want to get something done, change your strategy and be a good person, dick lick

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 2:50 PM, Hector Barrientos-Bullock <hectorbmail@xxx.com> wrote:

Slander has to be a lie.
harrassment is moot, due to your involvement AND association, as well as your attempted deception of me from facebook (which is now a legal document), to email, and i truly hope you DO testify.
You are oblivious to the exact nature of how damaging that would actually be to HER.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

You’re not the only one that keeps copy.

You have demonstrated yourself to be lower than what is left on the floors of a slaughter house, due to your actions in THIS incident alone.

Once again, thank you, Pawel.

By the way, have you heard of relevance and hearsay?

They would never LET you testify.

You’re not RELEVANT to our MARRIAGE, nor have you ever met me, nor have you ever met us together.

Where is your relevance?

How are you such an unintelligent idiot?

HOW have you survived this long?????

As for the burners, YOU’RE not considered a burner, and I don’t give a shit about psy.
And yes, I have checked with the burners.
NOBODY KNOWS WHO ANY OF YOU ARE.

Would you like me to send you the messages I have from the burners, all of whom do not know YOU or ONTONCA??

They only know Jika.

You really think you’re more important than you really are.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:02 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Dude – I will call Jiki right now and cuts you off her circles as well, you are a disease, she is my sister
(Author’s note- the are NOT blood related. He’s Polish. She’s Russian. Not that it matters…..)

So if I am not involved why do you bombard me with your hate and moron behavior, why do you harass me asshole? What did I do to you? I did try to help you a little before but stop involving me in your twisted mind. It’s not my drama, keep me out of it. You are a little man consumed by anger and hate. She left you because of it. So man up and stand up to what you did wrong. Stop bombarding me with your petty shit or I will make my steps to prevent you to do so. If you ever even remotely understand love and Buddhism, for which I beg you to take another look, you are destroying yourself. This is plain stupid but it is not my duty to walk you out of your hell. This is the last time I try to talk as a friend….

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:04 PM, Hector Barrientos-Bullock <hectorbmail@xxx.com> wrote:

You’re too late.
I cut myself off from everyone except the core burners over a year ago.
How do you think I know you guys are a joke to the burn community?
They do not like your kind.
They don’t like sociopaths.
Oooooooooo…..spoken like a true narcissist, by the way.
The flaunting of USELESS status, as no one but eastern european sociopaths go to the houses you know.

NO ONE IN THE BURN COMMUNITY LIKES YOU.

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:11 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Dude – I don’t care if someone likes me, but they do. Even your friends are emailing me telling me that you are crazy asshole

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:01 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Yeah – it’s called modesty, I don’t need to be in the lime light. I just provide love and services to my brothers and sisters in need. I am not a DJ or anything like that but I don’t have to pay for tickets and my house is always full of friends, and where and when I travel I don’t need to worry about the thing. And you are not welcome in most of the houses I know

From: Hector Barrientos-Bullock [mailto:hectorbmail@xxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 14, 2013 3:14 PM
To: Pawel Tulin
Subject: Re: Figure it out yet?

Do you READ what you write, before you write the next line?

I’m going to ENJOY posting this in my blog.

How you contradict yourself from one message to the next.

PRICELESS.

You are a narcissist bordering on sociopath.
You lie, you manipulate, you have an inflated sense of yourself, and call it modesty.
You are the oldest idiot I have met in my entire life.

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:09 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

No – you are – get a shrink. Most of the people I know think you are a joke bro, Just a stupid pathetic idiot. I don’t even know why I waste my time talking to you, maybe my Buddhist education in compassion. Anyway – travel well, you would be better of listening to my advice but this is hopeless. In a way I do feel for you and feel sorry for you, anger and hate are big things to overcome, they can kill you. If you will survive, you’ll be a better man, I know it from my own experience. Otherwise you will die misbul death, goodbye friend and good luck

From: Hector Barrientos-Bullock [mailto:hectorbmail@xxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 14, 2013 3:13 PM
To: ptulin@gmail.com
Subject: Re: Figure it out yet?

You are a sociopath and an IDIOT.

You lie and get caught and expect people to listen to you.
I post about you EVERY DAY.

“they will lie to your face and say they are your friends”

You are TEXT book.

I know children with more maturity than you.

And the bottle blonde of ania’s hair?

Nice.

From vidal sassoon to chez cvs.

The same yoga clothes from three years ago to go out?

must suck to live in one of the fashion capitals of the world, knowing she was a clothes horse, and now not able to buy one new piece of clothing.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:17 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Yeah? Maybe you should check my background… Ania might not have resources to sue you but I do so be careful
(Author’s note – Thank you for telling me Ania Ziolkowska is BROKE, not that it matters to me……)

Hector Barrientos-Bullock <hectorbmail@xxx.com> Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:18 PM

To: Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com>

Your point?
you still need a valid CASE.
idiot.

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:18 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

And regarding your blog, my lawyer already contacted wordpress few weeks ago, we are either suing them or they have to take you down
(Author’s note – Guess my outing them through this medium HAS had an effect…..)

Yeah man – that’s why when people hear about you – they are telling me to stay away from you. You are a disease and nobody wants to have anything with you, I am the only one left that still feels some compassion for you, but I am running short of patience…
(Author’s note – Pawel “Lost Patience” the moment he realized I could confirm he was both lying to me and trying to manipulate me. See – “Narcissistic Rage” )

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 3:19 PM, Hector Barrientos-Bullock <hectorbmail@xxx.com> wrote:

Go for it.
Not going to work and you don’t scare me.
Wordpress is not responsible for my blog.
I know the legalities of that as well.
Try again.

Get this through your head:
YOU
DON’T
SCARE
ME

On Wed, Aug 14, 2013 at 5:00 PM, Pawel Tulin <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

It is not about them – it is about you. You let hate and anger consume you. I am trying to save your soul but you are being an ass about it. Let it go bro, you will feel much better. I barely know them as well, I never met you too. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, it’s life

http://youtu.be/91OQwco7a58

(Author’s note – this is the new narcissist tactic. I don’t know who started it, but they think songs on youtube will evoke some sort of emotional response that will allow them to regain control. I know for a fact this works on women. It doesn’t work on ME. Once I have cut all empathy off from you, NOTHING you do or say affects me.)

From: Hector Barrientos-Bullock [mailto:hectorbmail@xxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 14, 2013 5:46 PM
To: Pawel Tulin
Cc: Chris Exeris
Subject: Re: Figure it out yet?

You have the mentality of a 14 year old girl.
I have never had more fun than I am having right now.
I have sparred against award winning psychiatrists, and WON.
But you?
Your limitless idiocy is the most fun I have EVER had.
Such perfect displays of collective narcissism.
Such perfectly textbook displays of borderline sociopathy.

The flailing in searching for something, ANYTHING, that you THINK might actually HURT me.

What was it the Joker said?

“there is nothing, NOTHING, that you can do to me.”

Ania calls herself Mukti?

You have no idea.

I am free from care of social status, of friends, of desire, of loneliness, of everything.

THAT is “mukti”, by definition.

Welcome to viewing a state none of you shall EVER achieve.

I not only do not NEED anyone, I do not WANT anyone.

Mukti.

And you thought you would school ME in buddhism?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Karma.

Do you know what that is?

All of you, including Ania and Chris, think you can outsmart or outrun your karma.

I am the karma she is attempting to outrun.

She thought it was about money when it’s always been about morality and integrity.

Seems you all have that mentality of

“I can do it to you, how DARE you be hurt by what I did, how DARE you expect me to be responsible for it, and how DARE you even THINK to do it to me!!!!”

I never say this, but I will say it now:

I am SMARTER than you.

I am quicker than you.

I am more resourceful than ALL of you, as you have learned.

You think that “he’s a bully” game plays when the blog went up?

No.

It lost all it’s validity.

It’s not about me, it’s about YOU.

(I even knew, as I told the last phone call I had about this conversation, that you would respond, just because I said you backed off.)

You are NOBODY, but really want desperately to be somebody.

I am happy with being nobody, while everyone wants me to be somebody.

if you had not blocked me, you would see how many more support me against people like you EVERYDAY.

So far it’s at least 1,400

There are more pages about narcissism appearing everyday.

There are more blogs about people like YOU, EVERY DAY.

Your time is over.

Now just be prepared to read all about this in the blog.

Accept defeat.

Maybe then you might actually know freedom.

(Author’s note – to understand this line, I must digress for a moment to here –

2:53pm

Pawel ArThou   you are just an idiot than

2:54pm

Shiva Bodhi Dharma No. I’m fed up. I have no patience for cluster b personality disorders and will hit them where it hurts the most.
Nor do I have patience for manipulators.

2:56pm

Pawel ArThou   bro – I am offering you a free session, just because I see your struggle, you either choose to be a free man or you will suffer for long
you can’t win, let me show you how to have some grace
I have been there
(Author’s note – Do we not see I just let him know he was attempting to manipulate me, AND HE STILL TRIES TO ANYWAY????)

2:59pm

Shiva Bodhi Dharma I do not want a session. I want the means to end the problems that are Ania Ziolkowska, my wife, and Chris “Exeris” Sevanick. Nothing else has value to me. Actually, neither do they. However taking the fight to them I do value. And apparently they can’t win either. You may wish to ask them how their friend Eva Annika Backstrom fared with the Maryland States Attorney.

3:00pm

Shiva Bodhi Dharma Eventually they will figure out I am smarter and quicker than they could ever dream of being. They haven’t figured that out yet. Good day.

3:05pm

Pawel ArThou   you should not focus how to hurt them, you should focus how to make your life beautiful, you should focus to be love and friend, just take a big breath my friend, we will talk once you let it go, I will help you and intro you to great people, maybe you will get her back but chances are – you will not want her anymore either…. just take a deep breath firsts and be impartial for a moment….

3:12pm

Shiva Bodhi Dharma I should focus in what’s healthiest for ME, and letting them get away with it is not healthy for me or anyone. It never was. That’s how it got here. That’s how ANYINE gets here. You may want to look up doctor Joyce brothers article entitle “don’t be so quick to forgive”. It applies. I don’t want her back. She had a child that Is more than likely not mine, she is and was deceptive, a gold digger, a liar, abusive, manipulative, without empathy of any kind except for herself.

Why would I want someone like that back?

Are you seriously thinking that? Is that what everyone believes???

There’s a saying I learned in Seattle:

“Girl, you are not that bomb.”

And she is not.

But she DID steal ten years of my life, and followed that with destroying what was left and then stole every dream I ever had, trying to be me, lying and deceiving the entire time.

And all your friends know them, so how the hell would or should I trust ANY of them, or consider them “great”?

– end Author’s note.)

On Aug 14, 2013, at 18:20, “Pawel Tulin” <ptulin@gmail.com> wrote:

Dude – keep my out of it or I will kick your ass

Dude – to start with – you are officially band from Poland forever, do not ever go there because you will never come back unless in body bag, and I promise you that

From: Hector Virgilio Barrientos-Bullock [mailto:hectorbmail@xxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, August 14, 2013 7:02 PM
To: <ptulin@gmail.com> Cc: Chris Exeris
Subject: Re: Figure it out yet?

By the way, physical threat of violence over email?

TWICE?

Thank you.

^_^

Sent from my iPhone

At this point, we can see several things –

Pawel, who has a degree in psychology, knows nothing about psychology.
I have an associates degree in accounting, and have put very little effort in out playing him at every turn.
How?
I know how cultists think. They think like Narcissists and Sociopaths, also known as Anti Social Personality Disorder.
How?
Ania Ziolkowska.
A decade with her and anyone would be a FOOL to not understand how a sociopath thinks.
As with most Sociopaths, and the cult indoctrinated, and even Narcissists, his bag of tricks and tools are limited to what he knows has worked on others. In the case of Pawel, he is limited to manipulation, intimidation, attempts at subterfuge, and then blatant intimidation. He can’t think outside the box of his experience. A robot.
“This worked on other people. This has to work on him…..eventually.”
WRONG.
(If you do business with him, take notes. This is how you outmaneuver him in negotiations.)
As with any cult, which functions on “Collective Narcissism”, they will do anything, ANYTHING, to protect the “ingroup”, which in this case is an abusive Anti Social Personality Disorder that is committing adultery.
In the protection of the “ingroup”, they can have done no wrong, and therefore the outlier, or “outgroup”, must always be the party at fault.
In the textbook manner of ALL Cluster B’s, they need to keep their abuses PRIVATE, hence the fear of this blog, and the threats to me, due to it’s mere existence.

Now, I know what is being said –

“How does this prove psytrance cultism?”

Remember, this is merely the “introduction”, utilizing Pawel as a way to introduce you to how cultists in this community think.
I want you to recognize the association of this mindset and behavior, the pontificated claims of spirituality COMBINED with this behavior, and it’s association to Narcissism, Collective Narcissism, and Anti Social Personality Disorders.
In the next part, we will again visit personal interactions, taking a break from Pawel Tulin, and associate Psytrance Culture with other, more prominent, cults.I will leave this here, as it is getting late, for you to ponder, until the next entry to this series…….

Narcissism? Egocentric? Asshole? (thestrangeroad.wordpress.com)
amos al psytrance (algorapaideia.wordpress.com)
New Monitors (gearslutz.com)
Channel The Madness (patronmagazine.me)
Interview with psytrance giants Zetan Spore (psypressuk.com)
First Look: Narciss AW13 Collection (stylecartel.com)
Current State of Psytrance (gearslutz.com)
Narcissism | Celebrity Culture | Narcissistic | Babble (babble.com)
Behind The Veil (patronmagazine.me)
Bass Sick Conflict (bassicart.wordpress.com)

Empathy and Lying

May 5, 2013June 25, 2016 / neonplasticlotus / 8 Comments

This example is fraught with hilarity in it’s morbidity.

One must ask, when one has full knowledge of the abuses that one’s wife has put someone through, the constant unprovoked physical attacks, the racial slurs (Ania Ziolkowska is white and Polish, and I am black by appearance, but Ania would call me an “Ignorant ass nigger” out of anger, unprovoked, never an apology), the public humiliations in front of mutual friends, a decade of hurt, tolerated for “love”…..

Chris Exeris, Chris Sevanick, Sociopath

WHY WOULD YOU IMMEDIATELY GET IN AN ADULTEROUS RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS SAME WOMAN WHILE SHE IS STILL MARRIED TO SOMEONE THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR FRIEND????

This is a perfect example of both the cognitive dissonance and hypocrisy present in the modern New Age Yoga and Spirituality movement.

There is a game of play – acting, showing one side but actually living another.

Ania lied her way to Poland, then India (emails from Ania to me are to follow) claiming to be learning to be a better wife, while pregnant with our child.

Ania then silently returned to the United States, visibly obvious that she has gone from her Zero size to a losing baby weight size, and promptly got into a relationship that would gain her status.

But where is the child?

Where is MY child?

What empathy is there in THAT?

I’ve come to understand that New Age and yoga followers do not actually understand the meaning of the word.

And that, among so many other fallacies, is where we have walked all over the traditions we claim to live and follow.

What we practice is NOT what the original vedantas state, the Yama’s and Niyama’s.

There is no “Right Speech” or “Right Action” in acts such as that.

And yet we will find ways, with silver tongues, to explain away our transgressions, vainly and narcissistically, while having no tolerance for the transgressions of others.

No EMPATHY.

Sadly hilarious.

Update –

It seems that Ania Ziolkowska is now publicly advertising her adulterous relationship status.
Let us not forget that, with no finalized divorce on record, this is still, in fact, ADULTERY.
(Poor little fool refuses to live in reality…..)

Ania Ziolkowska is advertising her adulterous relationship status

Of course she’s probably doing this so that people she meets in Poland and wherever will think she’s “famous” because she’s dating a celebrity……laughable at the “celebrity” status, but…..small minds…….

Conversely, Chris Sevanick (Chris Exeris) does NOT publicly advertise their relationship status to anyone except “friends” (people he poaches for his “narcissistic supply”)

Chris Exeris / Chris Sevanick doesn’t publicly advertise he’s in an adulterous relationship with Ania Ziolkowska

Though this is entirely conjecture, we can only believe that this signifies trouble in paradise, if Chris has demanded that she make this “Public”.
Only time will tell.

Brain scans can identify psychopaths even in childhood because they have no empathy when seeing people in pain (bizpsycho.com)
Psychopaths not wired for empathy (futurity.org)
Brain scans can identify psychopaths even in childhood because they have no empathy when seeing people in pain (jewishterrorism.com)
empathy used to abuse others and empathy used to help others (metafilter.com)
Psychopaths’ Brain Patterns Lack Means for Empathy (zen-haven.com)
Psychopaths’ Brain Patterns Lack Means for Empathy, Reveals Neuroimaging Study (medicaldaily.com)
Psychopaths are not neurally equipped to have concern for others (news.uchicago.edu)
Psychopaths’ Brains Aren’t Wired To Show Empathy, Study Finds (huffingtonpost.com)
The Yamas and Niyamas for “Normal” People (alexandragw.wordpress.com)
Antisocial Personality Disorder Symptoms (mademan.com)

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Neon Plastic Lotus

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Grains of Sound: The Great White Hoax

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Dhamma, or DHARMA, are the rules and and guidelines that make up the practices of buddhism. In other words, the 8 Fold Path, the 5 Precepts, the Dhammapa……all of those make up “Dhamma” / “Dharma”.

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Dhamma, or DHARMA, are the rules and and guidelines that make up the practices of buddhism.
In other words, the 8 Fold Path, the 5 Precepts, the Dhammapa……all of those make up “Dhamma” / “Dharma”.