Grains of Sound: The Great White Hoax

Chris Exeris (Christopher Michael Sevanick) believes the world owes him success, without having to actually work for it

Chris Exeris (Christopher Michael Sevanick) believes the world owes him success, without having to actually work for it

This one has been a long time in coming.

Actually, quite a few of the upcoming articles have been a long time in coming, but we’ll get to that later.
I will try to be as concise and to the point as possible, because I know there’s no reason to draw this out, and readers want their information quickly.
You’re welcome to scan, and check out the sound cloud links at your leisure.
Let’s get started, shall we?
 Christopher Michael Sevanick, AKA “Chris Exeris”, AKA “Grains of Sound” (his brother Jason is only part of GOS in the studio, another thing that shall be addressed in this review), has hit the big time!
He’s scored “Odyssee 2015”, in Berlin, for New Years Eve.
First, I will provide a more in depth review of Grains of Sound.
The first thing anyone should know is that Christopher Michael Sevanick, aka Chris Exeris, doesn’t even write half the music for Grains of Sound. Most sound design, and anything that is bass or beat oriented (and I don’t mean the binaural beats that he layers into the music, to hypnotize those with weak minds, like Ania Ziolkowska), is written and produced by his brother, Jason Sevanick, aka Jason Durant.
Jason has been carrying Chris for over a decade. 
 Jason is not from NYC, as he keeps telling everyone. He’s from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. He has a degree in sociology, which means he knows how to manipulate people and groups.
He claims NYC, in order to seem “cool”, internationally. He’s actually in Pittsburgh, as I write this, dealing with the impending death of his father (the family are all alcoholics), but that is subject for another upcoming article.
Chris Exeris is from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, not New York City

Chris Exeris is from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, not New York City

Chris Exeris is all about the image. He does just enough to get noticed, and nothing more.

Chris Exeris is all about the image. He does just enough to get noticed, and nothing more.

Let that sink in, when listening to Mindless Faith, or Grains of Sound.
 As a musician, he is mediocre, at best.
I wrote a review a while back, to illustrate the deception of how he markets himself, and how he feels the world owes him everything.
He countered by actually beginning to admit his brother helps him write the music for Grains of Sound.
He’s no longer part of Mindless Faith, not only because he actually contributed nothing whatsoever, but also because his bandmates began to see is current affair with Ania Ziolkowska for what it is:
Yoko Ono, Breaking up the Beatles. Except they’re not even the Beatles.
However, this isn’t about Ania Ziolkowska emulating Marie Curie, riding on fame that is not even hers, because she is incapable of any type of creativity whatsoever, herself.
No, this is about the fact that, after, again, listening to every single thing Grains of Sound has ever made, I came upon one truth:


 Chris may have learned how to use Ableton Live, but he hasn’t learned how to emote anything besides anger, and the productions of Grains of Sound are missing even THAT.
Ignoring that of all the dance music, psytrance holds the least emotion in it’s supposed music, Grains of Sound holds even less than that.
Listen to one of his tracks he made when he was in Poland, away from his brother. Be it “Trees Tell me their Secrets”, or “Booming Dunes“, you hear there’s not one modicum of emotion in either of them. You also learn that if there’s a “beat”, he’s incapable of making it. For that, he needs Jason.
See, the problem is he may technically know what to do in Ableton (and barely even that. Trees Tell me there secrets is over saturated in reverb), but translating any passion he MIGHT have into music just isn’t possible for him.
There’s such an overuse of phasing, and saturation, to mask the binaural beats he has layered within it, it has an immediately feeling of foreboding.
It’s suffocating.
It’s definitely not a vampire, I will give it that. It doesn’t wait for you to invite it in.
It doesn’t ask you out, seduce you, attempt to woo you.
No, absolutely not.
It attempts to force it’s way into your mind, like a home invasion robbery.
I still don’t understand how someone who claims to have been producing for 15 years can be this BAD………
So how, you may ask, does someone like this get a gig like Odyssee?
Chris Exeris Charmed his way into the German psytrance scene through Poland

Chris Exeris Charmed his way into the German psytrance scene through Poland

And he’s still a last minute decision, just as he was for the Zagoa festival in Cairo. He’s playing at the top of the evening, when most will be on the dance floor of the main room.
As you can see, Chris Exeris is playing at the TOP of the evening. Of course people will actually want to visit the chill out area MUCH later

As you can see, Chris Exeris is playing at the TOP of the evening. Of course people will actually want to visit the chill out area MUCH later

And anyone that does hear him will realize that, without drugs, he’s a huge disappointment.
And this “Live Synth Performance”?

People, he’s using Ableton.

ANYONE can program scenes and clips to be triggered by a midi controller. I do that myself. 

The set itself is pre-programmed, because he’s not even capable of mixing anything his brother didn’t make for him.

Chris Exeris doesn’t even OWN a synth.

So, congratulations, Grains of Sound. Congratulations on the opportunity to disappoint a larger set of listeners.
Author’s Note:
I wanted to get this in under deadline, so it’s actually unfinished. It will be an evolving article, as I transfer resources from my old iMac to my new Mac.

“Gone Girl” : The Devil’s Greatest Trick

“The Dental School, please.” I said as I stepped into the taxi.

“The dental school?” asked the african male driver, “What are you getting done?”

“They’re doing a root canal, to prepare for my implants.”

“Implants? Aren’t those painful? how did you lose the teeth?”

“My estranged wife knocked them out.”


“May I ask how that happened?”

“We were on a trip to Wildwood, NJ. It was the end of the trip. It had not been a good trip. She had been fighting with me before we left, and she did some things that were really disrespectful, like kissing a girl in a bathroom, and then telling me to deal with it.”


“Yes, that happened. Then, after a less than stellar weekend with friends, we were all driving back, and they asked us to stop at a house on the way. I asked her to come in and she refused. I knew it would take a long time, and I wanted her to come in because I know I am non-confrontational, and would not be able to get them to hurry it up, so we could get home.”


“So over an hour passed, and she finally comes in. I’m sitting on the couch with them. She just stands there, staring at me, and asks me to show her where the bathroom is. They tell us where it is, and she asked me to come with her. It was next to the kitchen. She doesn’t go to the bathroom, but pulls me into the kitchen. She had me sit her up on the counter, literally had me pick her up to place her on it, and I thought we were going to talk.”

“So what happened?”

We’re stuck in traffic, on the way to the NYU School of dentistry, so I actually have time to tell him this story. It’s rare that NYC taxi Drivers actually talk to you any longer, so, since he’s interested, I continue.

“She’s sitting there, and I’m waiting for her to talk, and then, suddenly, she raised her left fist, and tried to bring it down on my face. I was surprised, but I caught it. She lifted her right fist and did the same thing. I caught that one also.”

“WHAT?? Where did that come from? Why did she do that?”

“I have no idea, but that’s not the end of it. She then quickly leaned back, shoots forward, head buttes me in the mouth.”

You don't get to decide you didn't hurt someone


“Yes. I let go of her wrists, and grabbed my mouth. She leaned back, crossed her arms, and smiled.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“I wish I were.”

Silence, then, as he turns the corner,

“What happened after that?”

“I had to get a root canal, because the tooth was pressing against the nerve. Her dentist. She suggested him. I found out later they should have just tapped the tooth back into the canal.”

“But how does this become implants?”

“Well, because her dentist was an idiot, some Doctor Paul Stanciewickz, this was back in Virginia, the root canal was never finished, and that, according to my new Doctors, allowed for infection to get up into my gums. That spread to four other teeth, so now I am forced to pay almost $40,000 to replace the six teeth. One lower tooth is random. No idea why that one had to come out.”

She knocked out your teeth. She’s not paying for any of this?”

The denture I have to wear, due to the teeth Ania Ziolkowska knocked out by head butting me in the mouth

The denture I have to wear, due to the teeth Ania Ziolkowska knocked out by head butting me in the mouth

“Nope. And missing teeth causes a lot of problems. Go on interviews, and even if I’m wearing a three piece suit, they still judge you on your appearance. Teeth missing right in front of your mouth makes them think you’re a crack head. I have six teeth to replace, and she’s partying around the world and not paying a dime.”

“You’re serious?”

“Yup. She played victim after the tooth came out, cheated with some DJ, and ran off to Poland, then India, a place she knew I wanted to go to since 2001, when we met, and then moved here, to New York, before me, after refusing to for YEARS, with the DJ. Made a point to connect with people I met a year before her, while she was out of the country, and cried victim and said I was the one that abused her.”

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays. Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then "punished" herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays.
Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then “punished” herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.


“What the fuck???”

We’re getting close to the Dental School now, but he still wants to talk.

“Can’t you sue her?”

“Statute of limitations. I can’t do a thing.”

“Didn’t you press charges when she attacked you?”

“We were together, getting married. Of course I loved her, so I was an idiot and didn’t. Anyway, have you ever tried to be a guy reporting domestic violence from a woman?”

“You know what? I know what you mean. My friend is going through the same thing. His wife beats him and embarrasses him, and they don’t do anything about it.”

“Exactly, and in Virginia, it’s even worse.”

“So what did you do?”

“The only thing I could do, I started a blog.”


“Well, first I tried to party, and distract myself from everything, but she kept pulling things, while she was out of the country, like contacting my employers and ruining positions for me. I even became suicidal at one point. It’s hard for a man, in this situation, because no one believes you. YOU are always the bad guy.”

It didn’t even take him a second to ponder this.

“Man, thank you. You’re right. There’s NO protection for men against women. We’re just told to deal with it, be a man, get over it. Thank you for what you’re doing. No one does this. No one helps men who are attacked by women. Thank you so much. Keep doing what you’re doing, man.”

I paid him, shook hands, and went in to my appointment.

Gone Girl - Ben Affleck & Rosamund Pike

Gone Girl – Ben Affleck & Rosamund Pike

This is Domestic Abuse Month, and it’s been a long time since I have written an entry. And, in an interesting twist of fate, “Gone Girl” has also been released in theaters this month. Why is this relevant? Before I proceed, I should say,

“Spoiler Alert”!!!!

if you haven’t seen the movie, you should probably stop reading, go see it, and come back to this. Seriously, because this will be an exploratory of my personal experience, reveal what the movie is truly about, and illustrate a huge problem men like me have always known about, but have been defenseless in confronting. “Gone Girl”, now the number one movie in the United States, is, if one were to believe the contrived reviews, about a marriage. “Gone Girl” is not about a marriage. What “Gone Girl” is really about is the socialized control women have over society. Their duplicity, their manipulative nature, how they can get away with nearly anything, but “virtue” of the fact that they are women. All of the reviews attempt to obfuscate it, attempt to gloss over, to hide the true issue, however David Fincher was very successful in fleshing out a veiled allegory toward the contemporary feminist movement, illustrating how damagingly toxic the narcissism of women actually is. “That aspect of marriage as a con game, or whatever. The idea that we perform a sort of ideal version of ourselves that the other person wants. We perhaps belie our true nature in order to perform to the ideal. David and I talked a lot about living in an age of rampant narcissism.”

Women are narcissistic. Women are borderline sociopathic. Women are so much so, that they manipulate EACH OTHER.

When a woman feels “hurt” over her own mistake(s), she will instead choose to hurt someone else, more than likely the man she feels manipulated her (or, to be more accurate, did not fall easily toward her own manipulations, such as the student that fully knew she was having an affair with a married man.) Sometimes it’s because they come from Narcissistic parents (the mother) The absolutely obscure and cryptic “clues” they leave, expecting you to figure them out, with absolutely no reference at all (her maddeningly frustrating scavenger hunts) They manipulate men, and throw each other under the bus (the girl at the cabin) Men are disposable to them (Neil Patrick Harris) And once you figure they are a narcissistic sociopath, you know how to manipulate them back (the television interview) And they will explain away their own evil as “being a survivor” (how she justifies murdering Neil Patrick Harris to her husband, and getting away with it) There are so many allegories illustrated in “Gone Girl”, toward modern narcissism, especially female narcissism, in this film that it’s quite disturbing. At least it lets me know I’m not the only one that has seen this, both in relationships and in society. Oh! I almost forgot: Narcissists have a limited bag of tricks, a limited tool box, whether it’s to attract (the husband), or to punish (the wife), and bank on creating constant emotional states of confusion, to keep themselves from being found out as what they are. You’ll see this MULTIPLE times in the film. Basically, in the end, it shows that not only are both sexes narcissistic, but that women are MORE TOXIC, and MORE DAMAGING in their narcissistic sociopathy, but are allowed to get away with it, because, let’s face it, they’re “women”.

“Women, for instance, concentrate on their body (many also suffer from eating disorders: Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa). They  flaunt and exploit their physical charms, their sexuality, their socially and culturally determined “femininity”. In its extreme form this is known as HPD or the Histrionic Personality Disorder.

Ania Anicca how she really looks, nearly busting out of those clothes and double chins

Ania Anicca how she really looks, nearly busting out of those clothes and double chins

Ania Anicca vain and narcissistic as ever

Ania Anicca vain and narcissistic as ever

Many female narcissists secure their Narcissistic Supply through more traditional gender roles: the home, children, suitable careers, their husbands (“the wife of…”), their feminine traits, their role in

society, etc. It is no wonder than narcissists – both men and women – are chauvinistically conservative. They depend to such an extent on the opinions of people around them – that, with time, they are transformed into ultra-sensitive seismographs of public opinion, barometers of prevailing social fashions and guardians of conformity. Narcissists cannot afford to seriously alienate those who reflect to them their False Self. The very proper and on-going functioning of their Ego depends on the goodwill and the collaboration of their human environment.”

The myth of “male dominance” is a well manicured deception. And this has been happening for CENTURIES.

Psychology, like society at large, continues to be baffled by the persistent belief that men and women differ in important psychological ways, in spite of countless studies that fail to demonstrate such differences or that capture them for only a brief moment. New approaches avoid the polarization of `male’ and female’ traits, emphasizing how and why these qualities change over the life span, across cultures and throughout history. To understand where the differences are, we must look to narrative, power, and the conditions of our lives.

I have always said if a man does what a woman does, he’s labeled a “Narcissist”, but if a woman does it, she’s just “A Woman”.

Back to the spoilers……..

“Gone Girl” is about a female narcissistic sociopath that shows the entire range of manipulation that women wield in their absolutely socialized, essentially accepted, behaviors. These are the same behaviors I experienced with Ania.  As I said earlier, David Fincher and the writer, whom is a female, must have had their experience with Narcopaths, especially female narcopaths, because they lay the entire tool just bare in that film The actions, such as her leaving a clue based scavenger hunt, every year, with obscure clues only SHE could understand, that you don’t put together until after they are gone, and your head is clear of the constant emotional distress they put you through Ania left her journals behind, I can only assume expecting me to read them. (I didn’t read them until I learned of her and Chris “Exeris” Michael Sevanick. I respect privacy, unlike Ania, who read my journals before we were even dating. I realize now she did that in order to read me, and manipulate me. That’s what narcissists do.)

I don't do well with hints. You're an adult. Speak your damn mind.

Ania Ziolkowska would leave the most cryptic hints, rather than being upfront.
This is how narcissists manipulate and gaslight.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays. Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, In queens, at Psychill Psysundays.
Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then “punished” herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

Ania had her email address and phone number sent to me via an old email she knew I had access to, but never checked, I realized later, to give me a way to contact her, before she jumped BACK into bed with Chris. She was already fucking him before she left. Uzi Grindler told me. It was Chris’s child she adopted out, after she went to india, to hide her pregnancy, not mine. Little obscure clues, just so they can say you never paid attention to them, so they can justify to themselves what they do to

Gone Girl - Ben Affleck Agonizing over Rosamund's Scavenger Hunt Clues

Gone Girl – Ben Affleck Agonizing over Rosamund’s Scavenger Hunt Clues

you. The manipulation of other women, and men, as Ania did with Eva “Annika” Backstrom and Uzi Grindler (Uzi wanted to fuck Ania anyway

“Don’t they look so alike?”,

Uzi would constantly say about Ania and Annika, and apparently DID, which allowed Ania to get them to ignore incidents they witnessed, such as physically attacking me in the back of their rented Infinity SUV, my only offense being listening to an iPod, on our way to a Stella Nutella show in NYC, and, later, connecting Ania to Chris Exeris, Annika’s ex boyfriend, all in Uzi’s wanting to get revenge upon me for outing his cheating on Annika, which I was forced to do, because he refused to stay out of my relationship – I was actually curing Ania of her narcissism, and he reversed it all, for his own selfishness, Uzi and Eva “Annika” Backstrom, themselves being Narcissistic Sociopaths.) In one of our earliest blogs, we get to hear Ania’s version of how my teeth were lost……..

  • 8:09pm John What happened to make him so fucked up?
  • Exeris Icon8:09pm Dj-vj Exeris he’s been that way for a long time
  • 8:09pm John He says she abused him for 10 years
  • Grains of Sound Icon8:09pm 

    Dj-vj Exeris made worse by doing meth every day for 3 years (Author’s note – Hearsay. He does not know this, nor can he prove it, which makes this SLANDER.)

  • 8:09pm John  Says he begged her to move to NYC and she said no
  • Douche Bag Icon8:09pm Dj-vj Exeris yea he has twisted everything (Author’s note – This catches up to him later.)
  • 8:10pm John When did he do that? He looked healthy to me?
  • Exeris Icon8:10pm Dj-vj Exeris not sure if he belives his lies or not (Author’s note – Pot calling the kettle black…..)
  • 8:10pm John  He doesn’t even smoke
  • Grains of Sound Icon8:10pm Dj-vj Exeris 97-2000 (Author’s note – Interesting as neither Ania Ziolkowska, nor I met Chris Sevanick until 2008. And we only hung out with him a total of THREE TIMES between 2008 and 2010. I met him again after Ania Ziolkowska lied and went to Poland, then India, and told him everything that happened between us, and even have additional proof. As I said, this catches up with him later.)

So, according to Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska (Ania got the “Anicaa” name at “Yogaville”, during her teacher training. They don’t know what the word means, and she can’t come up with anything original on her own. No narcissist can, actually), the story she concocted, is that I did meth for three years, before returning and pursuing her, and I had ALL of my teeth, until TEN YEARS AFTER SUPPOSEDLY DOING METH???

I seem to have a full mouth of teeth here.....oh! And Ania seems to be THIN. Hmmmmm.....

I seem to have a full mouth of teeth here, even if they ARE yellowed from smoking, something I finally have been able to quit…..oh! And Ania seems to be THIN. Hmmmmm…..

This is the story she fabricated to cover the damage she could no longer hide.

But, what’s more disgusting, more disturbing, is OTHER PEOPLE BELIEVED IT. 


Because she’s a girl, that’s why.

Ania Anicca has one of the most practiced fake “charm personalities” known to man

Up until recently, there has been no support, no resources, for male victims of domestic violence. As a matter of fact, if you are a man and the subject is brought up, it is actually assumed that YOU are the abuser. Even the police essentially refuse to believe that women, especially small, petite, demur women, can actually be the abusers (not that Ania is small, petite, or demure, ANY LONGER….)

The CDC’s Web site also cites data showing: “In the United States every year, about 1.5 million women and more than 800,000 men are raped or physically assaulted by an intimate partner,” and 24 percent of intimate partner homicide victims were male (‘‘) Experts have expressed concern that male victims have been unfairly ignored due to gender-driven politics and that this contributes to the intergenerational cycle of domestic violence. When male victims are ignored or just “take it,” their children suffer long-term damage by the exposure and are more likely to commit the violence as adults.  The mass media often contributes to this neglect by framing domestic violence as “battered women” or as primarily a male crime and by citing inaccurate crime data. The media says “men and women” when covering soldiers or fire-fighters; it should do the same for male domestic violence victims. The National Coalition of Free Men calls on the media for fair reporting this October. As Dear Abby said, “Domestic violence is a human problem, not a gender problem.”

But, as illustrated above, and in the movie “Gone Girl”, a woman can play victim, and get away with even the WORST atrocities (such as murdering someone she thought to use, as she did with Neil Patrick Harris.)

More men than women were victims of intimate partner physical violence within the past year, according to a national study funded by the Centers for Disease Control and U.S. Department of Justice. According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (hereinafter NISVS) released in December, 2011, within the last 12 months an estimated 5,365,000 men and 4,741,000 women were victims of intimate partner physical violence. (Black, M.C. et al., 2011, Tables 4.1 and 4.2) 1 This finding contrasts to the earlier National Violence Against Women Survey (Tjaden, P. G., & Thoennes, N., 2000)(hereinafter NVAWS), which estimated that 1.2 million women and 835,000 men were victims of intimate partner physical violence in the preceding 12 months. (One-year prevalence “are considered to be more accurate [than lifetime rates] because they do not depend on recall of events long past” (Straus, 2005, p. 60))

Do a basic google search about domestic violence, and you have to DIG to get the following results:

About two in five of all victims of domestic violence are men, contradicting the widespread impression that it is almost always women who are left battered and bruised, a new report claims. Men assaulted by their partners are often ignored by police, see their attacker go free and have far fewer refuges to flee to than women, says a study by the men’s rights campaign group Parity.

Or “A Voice for Men”which, if you didn’t know it existed, you would never find it

From this information researchers found that of the 18,761 relationships, 76% were non-violent and 24% were violent. Of the 24% that were violent, half had been reciprocal and half had not—reciprocal meaning there was violence inflicted by both partners. Although more men than women (53% versus 49%) had experienced non-reciprocal violent relationships, more women than men (52% versus 47%) had taken part in ones involving reciprocal violence. This statistic was undoubtedly the most striking: in committing acts of domestic violence, more women than men (25% versus 11%) were responsible. In fact, in the 71% of non-reciprocal partner violence instances, the instigator was the woman. This flies in the face of the long-held belief that female aggression in a relationship is most often predicated on self-defense. Further, while injury was more likely when violence was perpetrated by men, in relationships that featured reciprocal violence, men were injured more often (25% of the time) than women (20% of the time).

A medical journal

While aggression in heterosexual relationships is believed to stem from men, a recent study presented on June 25 at a symposium on intimate partner violence (IPV) at the British Psychological Society’s Division of Forensic Psychology annual conference in Glasgow, found women are more likely to be “intimate terrorists,” or physically aggressive to their partners than men.

A Telegraph UK article of a FEMALE DOCTOR LEAD STUDY

Dr Elizabeth Bates, who led the study at the University of Cumbria, said: “Previous studies have sought to explain male violence towards women as arising from patriarchal values, which motivate men to seek to control women’s behaviour, using violence if necessary.”

Even Time Magazine, though you can see the obvious feminist slant, since the feminists have a huge lobby, and they want to not piss off that demographic, even when the facts illustrate otherwise 

Research showing that women are often aggressors in domestic violence has been causing controversy for almost 40 years, ever since the 1975 National Family Violence Survey by sociologists Murray Straus and Richard Gelles of the Family Research Laboratory at the University of New Hampshire found that women were just as likely as men to report hitting a spouse and men were just as likely as women to report getting hit. The researchers initially assumed that, at least in cases of mutual violence, the women were defending themselves or retaliating. But when subsequent surveys asked who struck first, it turned out that women were as likely as men to initiate violence—a finding confirmed by more than 200 studies of intimate violence. In a 2010 review essay in the journal Partner Abuse, Straus concludes that women’s motives for domestic violence are often similar to men’s, ranging from anger to coercive control.

But, as I said earlier, you have to dig to almost subterranean levels, in order to obtain this data. For me to find them, I had to finally do a Google search of “Women More Violent Than Men” Why?

As it is profitable to claim victimhood in this age, a good indicator is whether any condemnation by the supposedly oppressed of their oppressor could be similarly uttered if the positions were reversed.  We know that what Rev. Jeremiah Wright said about whites could not be said by a white pastor about blacks, and we see even more of a double standard regarding what women and men can say about each other in America today.  This reveals one of the darkest depths of the human mind – when a group is utterly convinced that they are the ‘victims’ of another group, they can rationalize any level of evil against their perceived oppressors.    Go to any major ‘feminist’ website, such as or, and ask polite questions about the fairness of divorce laws, or the injustice of innocent men being jailed on false accusations of rape without due process.  You will quickly be called a ‘misogynist’ and banned from commenting.  The same is not true for any major men’s site, where even heated arguments and blatant misandry are tolerated in the spirit of free speech and human dignity.  When is the last time a doctrinaire ‘feminist’ actually had the courage to debate a fair woman like Camille Paglia, Tammy Bruce, or Christina Hoff Somers on television?  Ever-tightening groupthink that enforces an ever-escalating narrative of victimhood ensures that projection becomes the normal mode of misandrist thought.  The word ‘misogynist’ has expanded to such an extreme that it is the Pavlovian response to anything a ‘feminist’ feels bad about, but cannot articulate in an adult-like manner.  This reveals the projected gender bigotry of the ‘feminist’ in question, which in her case is misandry.  For example, an older man dating women 10 years younger than him is also referred to as a ‘misogynist’ by the older bitterati.  Not an ageist, mind you, but a misogynist.  A man who refuses to find obese women attractive is also a ‘misogynist’, as are gay men who do not spend money on women.  The male non-compliance labeled as ‘misogyny’ thus becomes a reaction to many years of unopposed misandry heaped on him first, when he initially harbored no such sentiments.  Kick a friendly dog enough times, and you get a nasty dog.  There are laws such as the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), that blatantly declares that violence against women is far worse than violence against men.  VAWA is very different from ordinary assault laws, because under VAWA, a man can be removed from his home at gunpoint if the woman makes a single phonecall.  No due process is permitted, and the man’s IConstitutional rights are jettisoned.  At the same time, half of all domestic violence is by the woman against the man.  Tiger Woods’ wife beat him with a blunt weapon and scratched his face, only to be applauded by ‘feminists’ in a ‘you go girl’ manner.  Projection can normalize barbarism. 

I received a DUI charge and conviction, because, after having taken my prescribed Ambian, when I asked Ania to leave, so I could sleep, tired an hungry, in an apartment she succeeded in having us evicted from IN ONE WEEK, due to HER behavior (that was told to me in confidence, by the leasing manager of the Aspen, in Alexandria, VA), she instead attacked me, and chased me out of the apartment. Knowing what I just listed above, I got in my Mini, and attempted to drive away. Not having eaten, my Ambian kicked in in ten minutes, rather than 20, and I had a victimless accident. The Mini caught fire, and I had to be pulled out of the burning car. Ania Anicca immediately went to the police, while I was passed out, and said

“I think he was trying to kill himself. He took Ambian.”

But how did Ania Anicca spin it, playing victim all the way, when she tells other people the story? 

  • 9:31pm Dj-vj Exeris when she left she left him with everything
    the apartment
    even paid for the apartment for a whole year
    gave him half of her 401K
  • 9:32pm John He said she caused him to get a DUI because he was trying to get away from her while fighting
    Said Shee lost him three jobs and two apartments
    Lost him his car
    She tell you anything About that?
  • 9:32pm Dj-vj Exeris he got a DUI because he swallowed a whole jar of ambien or some other such pills and then got into a car
    he didnt have to do that
    she didnt make him do that
    you see how he is not taking responsibility for his actions? (Author’s note – JAR???? Also, there are details missing to that explanation, as she full well knows.)
  • 9:33pm John He said he did not get half her 401k she paid for an apartment so she wouldn’t have no eviction on her record
  • 9:33pm Dj-vj Exeris he wrecked his car
  • 9:33pm John He told me about that but why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – first time asked. Pay attention. This is a tactic Ania uses.)
  • 9:33pm Dj-vj Exeris she saved both of them from having an eviction on their record. she didnt have to do that
  • 9:34pm John He told me all that. But why was she fighting with him and why did he leave?
    She saved herself from having an eviction then
  • 9:34pm Dj-vj Exeris the point is he took the pills and got into the car
  • 9:34pm John Look I sorta don’t care but none of this makes sense
    Why did he leave?
  • 9:35pm Dj-vj Exeris didnt he tell you?
    leaving is not a crime, but getting into a car after taking so many pills is
  • 9:35pm John Because she was fighting with him and she tried that domestic violence thing before so he left
  • 9:35pm Dj-vj Exeris he was lucky not to have killed anyone (Author’s note – Avoidance.)
  • 9:36pm John He said he wished they’d left him in his burning car after finding out what she did
    He has the report where she told them they were fighting and he left
  • 9:36pm Dj-vj Exeris doesnt change the fact that he took a whole bottle of pills and got into a car (Author’s note – Deferral of fault. Still doesn’t acknowledge the FIGHT.)
  • 9:36pm John Then calmly told then she thought he was trying to kill himself and what he took
    Was she fighting with him?
    Did she try to do that before?
    You seein where it makes no sense?
    It was his place why would he leave?
  • 9:37pm Dj-vj Exeris makes sense that if he was laying passed out she would be afraid for his life and tell the police he took pills (Author’s note – HOW does that answer the question, and what does that have to do with the question? )
  • 9:38pm John Unless she was fighting with him and he didn’t want to deal with her lying to the cops
  • 9:38pm Dj-vj Exeris and its not her fault he took the pills
    and got into a car (Author’s note – STILL avoiding that fight point, isn’t she? Deferral and deflection. Narcissism one oh one.)
  • 9:38pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the THIRD time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
  • 9:38pm Dj-vj Exeris he could have killed someone (Author’s note – Deflected again. You get the point, so I will not point it out any longer.)
  • 9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the FOURTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
  • 9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris lots of people fight
  • 9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the FIFTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
  • 9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris but who takes a bottle of pills and gets into a car? (Author’s note – Avoidance. Attempting to put the onus upon the victim. Victim blaming.)
  • 9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the SIXTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
  • 9:39pm Dj-vj Exeris that is really irresponsible (Author’s note – OMISSION and victim blaming.)
  • 9:39pm John Why was she fighting with him? (Author’s note – This is the SEVENTH time this question has been asked DIRECTLY.)
  • 9:40pm Dj-vj Exeris beyond irresponsible
    he could have killed someone (Author’s note – Further attempt at redirection from the TRUTH.)
  • 9:40pm John Look it looks like he’s not the only one avoiding their issues (Author’s note – Obviously THEY are avoiding more than I am.)
  • 9:40pm Dj-vj Exeris sounds like they were both arguing with each other
    and it sounds like they did that a lot
  • 9:41pm John I deal with psych patients all the time and she hasn’t accepted her fault in anything That’s just my two cents
  • 9:41pm Dj-vj Exeris sounds like it was a good thing that the relationship ended (Author’s note – Here’s where the Narcissistic Personality Disorder aspect of Ania Ziolkowska REALLY shows. All that yogaall that mediationIndiaNepal, and still THE EXACT SAME ISSUES. Actually, DUE to all of that, she has gotten WORSE.)
  • 9:41pm John I’m not judging, but you might wanna really wonder why she’s really with you.
  • 9:41pm Dj-vj Exeris and you can tell by whats going on now who the victim was all along (Author’s note – YES, we CAN.)
  • 9:42pm John Just lookin out for my boy
  • 9:42pm Dj-vj Exeris he says he is the victim (Author’s note – And Ania Ziolkowska’s words and actions PROVE THAT TO BE TRUE.)

And that’s not even touching on how Ania Anicca, in that conversation, attempted to make a supposed suicide of someone she could care less about ALL ABOUT HER. The facts show, and have repeatedly shown, that domestic abuse against men, by women, is repeatedly and continuously buried, or ignored, on such an accepted social level that it’s just disgusting. But how can you continue to argue about and ignore THIS?

I can tell you a story. It’s a story about when Ania did meth. We had a friend named Brian, who had seen the success I created by how I made and marketed an after hours club in Washington, DC (another thing I regret, as it put me in business with two Jewish cheats, and Narcissists, Ian Morgenstein, WHOM I INVITED IN AFTER IT WAS CREATED, and Uzi Grindler, whom has already been mentioned above – crazy how Ania ran to the sides of the people that cheated both me and her, which is what narcissists do – they go to their own kind), and began to shadow me, to learn how to throw parties himself. I don’t think he ever understood that when I threw a party, it was for the attendees, not to fill my pockets, or inflate my ego. Brian was dealing and addicted to meth. He was over at our house in Alexandria, VA, one night, and he gave it to her to try. I had to go to work. Ania wasn’t working. Fired, again. I asked him not to have it around her, and he gave it to her anyway. I’m preparing to go to work, and Ania is smashing every single glass in the kitchen.




I rush into the kitchen to stop her, and she attacks me, tackles me, and I somehow keep us away from the glass on the floor. She’s in her robe, naked underneath, and I have her on her back.


I am forced to let her go. I have to go to work, at that time contracted to arrange displays in grocery stores, dried scars on my face, and the women I worked with, as I was the only man, asked me what happened. I was an idiot, constantly covering Ania’s abuse of me, so I lied –

“Our cat clawed me in my sleep. She’s a little feral. She’s a rescue kitten.” 

The woman who was my supervisor stood there and stared at me, grabbed my forearm, and took me to the pharmacy, grabbed a box of “Mecderma”, and told me to buy it and apply it, which I did.

She didn’t believe me. She knew another girl’s claw marks when she saw them.  

However, most of the time, Ania’s abuses were NOT under the influence of drugs. Ania Anicca must have obviously been prejudiced, and felt she could abuse all the black men in her life.

“She used to chase me around the house with pots and pans, trying to hit me with them.” Charles Gudet, another black ex of hers later told me.

Charles told me a lot of things, most of which will be visited upon later, in new blogs, just as we will visit upon Uzi Grindler, and Eva “Annika” Backstrom. “Gone Girl” covers all of this, including the ending, illustrating that even when you think you’re free, they still hatch plots to steal your life. For me, that was Ania Anicca stealing all of my dreams for herself. Okay, I think we will call this “part one”, because there is so much more I could write, but it took me forever to put most of this together, just to get this down for Domestic Abuse Month, which this is, and I literally have a decade of abuse to flesh out. But I had to write this, because, as the cabbie said, someone needs to speak up for abused men, so that someone may as well be me (and a few other men who finally have the courage to speak out.) Domestic Violence, like racial prejudice (another subject we touched upon earlier, and will return to later), is narcissism. Narcissistic Sociopathy, to be more accurate. Also known as narcopathy or psychopathy, and “Gone Girl” shows for all to see, both the prevalence of this, and the completely imbalanced scale upon which it weighs. By the way, did you know that “Twilight”, Ania’s favorite series, she even has the Polish version, “Saga Zmierzch”, which is how she read it (probably so I couldn’t read that she was reading about how she was treating me (Hint: Ania is Edward, NOT Bella. We will explore in a later blog how narcissists, such as Ania, project their personalities on to their victims), is about Domestic Abuse?  “If you’ve suspected that there’s something unhealthy about the relationship between Bella and Edward in the phenomenally successful Twilight series, then it turns out that you’re exactly right. In fact, there are fifteen examples of unhealthiness.” Next time we will explore how Ania, was going to a domestic violence counselor named Lynn Greenfield, in Alexandria, VA, under the advice of Eva “Annika” Backstrom and Uzi “Ozzie” Grindler. The same ones who would watch Ania abuse ME, and knew Ania had knocked out my teeth, remember? Uzi is israeli, and was teaching Ania how to psychologically manipulate the outcome SHE wanted, with the help of getting the abusive relationship checklist from Lynn Greenfield, and how Ania has assimilated in NYC, and all her travels, by essentially mimicking ME. She DID have ten years to learn how to be me, after all. At least on the surface. She’s still empty on the inside.

I usually save these for jabs at “Exeris” (that name, oh my god that NAME.…), but after this post, you all deserve a treat…..

Part two is on it’s way, and comments can be left at the bottom of the page, but always remember……

“La plus belle des ruses du diable est de vous persuader qu’il n’existe pas.” (“The devil’s finest trick is to persuade you that he (or she) does not exist.”)”

~ Charles Baudelaire

“If I whine enough….Maybe People will LIKE me???”

This one has been a long time in coming……….

#Chris_Exeris Recent rant about not being paid 2014-03-15 at 10.13.05 AM

#Chris_Exeris Recent rant about not being paid 2014-03-15 at 10.13.05 AM

The sad truth is this isn’t the absolute worse of Chris Exeris’s patently unprofessional whining (Which is part of the reason why h’s no longer a part of Mindless Faith, the first band he created…..).

No, it gets MUCH worse……… Screen Shot 2014-05-03 at 12.27.06 AM Previously we spoke about how Chris, like many narcissists, used compliments to manipulate others, and does so quite effectively, it has seems, however, as you can see, this is another ploy Narcissists use to gain what are known as “Flying Monkeys”, which are another version of “Narcissistic Supply”

However, We are getting ahead of ourselves, aren’t we? In the exchange above, you see the other way an Inverted Narcissist, such as Chris Exeris, will puff up their increasingly fragile egos. Besides the link in the sentence above (there are links in every single one of our posts, here on NPL) let’s give an explanation of an inverted narcissist:

“Inverted narcissists are codependents who emotionally depend exclusively on classic narcissists. Narcissists and inverted narcissists are, in many ways, two sides of the same coin, or “the mold and the molded” (Sam Vaknin) – hence the terms “mirror narcissist” or “inverted narcissist”. Inverted narcissists are much rarer and harder to identify than the boastful, arrogant “classic” narcissist. Surprisingly for a narcissist, the inverted type is self-effacing and/or introverted.”

I will say from personal experience that I disagree with two points above.

  1. That they are very rare. I feel the number of them has been increased, due to several societal influences

  2. It neglects to utilize Sam Vankin’s assessment, which is that the inverted narcissist is, themselves, a narcissist Since he coined the classification, he should know.

But let’s get back to the point at hand. One of the ways a narcissist, or inverted narcissist, such as Chris Exeris, manipulate others is in the playing the victim role, as can be seen above. “But”, you may ask, “If they are always needing to be in the dominant role, if they are always manipulating you, how does being a victim benefit them?” Well, it seems that playing victim, and I know this from experience, as Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska did this all the time, the flip flop, the yo-yo, from victim, to dominance, to victim, it is merely another manipulation:

“Another way that the narcissist’s ego gets special attention is through the role of being a victim.

Welcome to the victimized extreme narcissist.

Most persons recognize ego as arrogance. At the same time they fail to see the subtle deception of ego when it takes the role of a being a victim. As kind and compassion-driven human beings, we easily are fooled by this form of extreme ego. We are constantly hearing the voices of the needy in the media through a variety of forms. The disenfranchised, the poor, the homeless, the hurting, the refugees, the abused, and the list goes on. What we often do not see is that we are many times shamed by these voices for not doing enough for them. All along it is easy to be manipulated as we respond from our hearts. The deception of the ego is that the narcissist can hide behind misfortune and victimization in order to shame you into feeling and believing that they suffer more than you do.

They will say that you don’t care enough for them.

They will make you feel that you have not done enough to help them.

The ego wants attention, control, gain, and power over others by positioning itself as a “poor and helpless” victim. It does this; all the while it soaks up the attention and control over others. In the eyes of an extreme narcissist, their situation is always right and totally justified. Instead of taking responsibility for self and consequences, the extreme narcissist tries to make others feel responsible for their plight. Because extreme narcissists are incredibly adept at the game of manipulation, they will always find a way to turn the tables on you.

They will try to make you responsible and feel guilty for not helping them or taking their side and cause. ~ Samuel Lopez de Victoria, PhD

As we can see by the description above, we must recognize that Chris Exeris (Christopher Michael Sevanick) hit’s all the red flags of an inverted narcissist that quickly adopts the victim role in order to manipulate others. And this has served him quite well.

It’s gotten him a stolen relationship with a rent free home in Poland, hasn’t it?

And that’s the point. Just as he manipulated praise out of everyone in that thread above, he manipulated Ania to provide him his haven. Now, we must realize she always planned to hook someone, more than likely Chris, to come back to Poland with her, to be the breadwinner, so she could be the “housewife”, not required to do anything at all, however, Chris, realizing this, has completely flipped that script upon her, and is definitely taking advantage of the situation.

“Sometimes your narcissist may play at being ‘victim’, needing you to reassure and console, and at other times he may take center-stage as the ‘rescuer’, to be admired and praised.

And while you are trying to keep up with the narcissist as he changes roles in this game, you also have to continue to change roles, in an effort at self-preservation.

When he is the victim, you must be the rescuer. When he is the rescuer – he needs someone to rescue.

You must seemingly always play the flip-side to his narcissistic character of the moment.”

Of course, we have already established that Ania is also an Inverted Narcissist, therefore this is a game of whom is actually using whom. The reality is Ania has the “control” because the home in Poland is hers, left to her by her family, after her grandmother died (all she really wanted out of her grandmother in the first place), while he has an almost equal amount of control by being the one that comes back to the USA to try to make money, occasionally, so they can take advantage of the 2 to 1 exchange rate of Poland. And we must also recognize that by the same instance, the psytrance culture he associates in, made up mostly of Eastern Europeans (Primarily Russians, though there are some Polish), is also a vipers nest of Inverted Narcissists, preying and feeding upon one another, but it is Chris (and maybe Ontonca) and Ania that have always used the victim ploy, as a way to manipulate these flying monkeys for them. We shall visit upon how Ania also manipulates others for narcissistic supply, and has since childhood, in upcoming blogs, the sheer and utter hypocrisy of ALL narcissists (and spiritual narcissists), as well as how they, as does all of psytrance culture, support Israel in the mass murder of civilians in Gaza. Until next time…….


Narcissist, Sociopath, Racist……. (Ania Ziolkowska)


Louis Vuitton - RACIST

Louis Vuitton – RACIST


Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska, current day, at a drug infested psytrance party in Warsaw, Poland, March 2014 She’s the one smiling, to the right, dressed all in black. We’ll talk about her massive weight gain in another blog.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, October 18th, 2015 In queens, at Psychill Psysundays. Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then "punished" herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

Ania Ziolkowska Destroys and runs. Here she is dancing at Riou, October 18th, 2015 In queens, at Psychill Psysundays.
Ania Ziolkowska Knocked out my teeth, then “punished” herself by jumping on another dick, and partying around New York City.

I stopped cold, my heart stopped, I nearly dropped the muffler on my head.
I was frozen, and it was over 75 degrees F

I just couldn’t believe she said it.

Someone I cared about, and was willing to die for, and would have done anything for, using the worst possible term in the worst possible way, for no reason at all.

If I had attacked Ania Ziolkowska, now going by “Ania Anicca” (A subject to be touched on in another entry), I could almost understand it.
Hell, if I had called her a bitch or a cunt, it might have been justified.

But that’s not what happened.

All I did was ask her, for the third time

“Ania, could you please hold the flashlight lower? I can’t see what I’m doing.” 

That’s it.
THAT is what got the response that opens this experience.

We had bought a Jaguar XJ-S, a 1989, from a gentleman in Connecticut, and driven it back to Woodbridge, VA, where we both lived.
Ania has just been fired from the position I had arranged for her to get, when she was let go from a receptionist position she had been doing a week before.

So she would not have to wait for me, I gave her the keys to the Jag, and told her she could go home and get me later, when I got off.

We worked at the same place.

It turns out that one of the exhaust hangers, a special order item, had rusted through, and the muffler fell off, and Ania had been dragging it behind her.

The FIRST thing I told Ania, when she told me what had happened, was it wasn’t her fault. 

It could have happened to ANYONE, it just happened to happen to her.

Not her fault.

I didn’t blame her, and I told her so.

Apparently that didn’t matter.


That’s what I got, from the blonde haired, blue eyed, Polish, white girl, while I was lying under the car, in a Wal-Mart parking lot, trying to find a way to hang the muffler, so we could get home, no longer dragging it under us.

And it wasn’t the last time Ania Ziolkowska, Ania Anicca, or whatever she wants to call herself now, as she vagabonds around the world, scamming family members, pretending she is suddenly a “spiritual yogini”, committing adultery with the ugliest white guy anyone has ever seen, Chris “Exeris” Sevanick

“He looks like a thumb….” 

That was one of the most recent descriptions, by my 21 year old female friend, before she showed the picture of “Exeris” (my god, these nicknames, they do not FIT. The latin it comes from is everything BUT an accurate description of HIM…..) to her friends, and her girlfriend.

“He is NOT an attractive man.” 

Is another description of “Exeris” (I’m sorry, but I chuckle every time I see the name, type the name, HEAR THE NAME) was the description given by several other females that have seen him.

But I digress.

This is not about THAT joke of a human being, but about Ania Ziolkowska, Racist Covert Stealth Narcissist Sociopath.

We could say one could not fault Ania, due to her father, Christoff Ziolkowska (whom Ania attempted to fool me for YEARS, into believing his name was “Ziolkowski”, however the name on their Deed to their house, is “Ziolkowska”. Ania tried Gaslighting for YEARS…..), also being a racist.

The first time I met him, I was standing in their second home (yes, Ania’s family is comfortably well off, I didn’t learn till MUCH later, while Christoff would complain how hard it was to make it in this country, but has a sailing yacht, and for years, two homes, completely paid off, and in relatively high dollar areas of Lake Ridge, VA) standing in front of him with my three year old niece, reaching out my hand to shake his.

“Get out of my house.”

Was all I got in return.

Not even a hand shake.

As I walked out, I just chuckled……..

………….and then had to explain to a three year old what racism was.

Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska would use racial slurs as a way to erode my self esteem and confidence

Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska would use racial slurs as a way to erode my self esteem and confidence

But I wasn’t the only black man Ania Ziolkowska had ever dated.

There was one before me.

Charles Gudet

And, apparently, Ania’s father, Christoff, liked him, probably because he was lighter than me, probably because his father worked for one of the alphabet agencies in DC, probably because he had had a trust fund, that Ania promptly conned and cajoled him into spending……..ON HER.

Every penny.

Ania Ziolkowska bled him dry.

I met Charles, when we moved to Old Town, Alexandria, because that is where Ania wanted to move, one of the most expensive cities in Virginia, bordering DC.

I should have realized THEN what Ania was, but I still didn’t.

I was blinded by love………..

THAT will NEVER happen again.

Ania never apologized.

I should be fair……Ania never apologized without being told she NEEDED to apologize.

This was a constant issue with Ania, the fact she would do horrendous things to you, THINGS SHE WOULD NOT ALLOW DONE TO HER, and she would NEVER apologize.

Not once

I waited to see if she would realize what she did was wrong. If she would have any sense of remorse, any awareness to even NOTICE HOW IT AFFECTED ME.

I waited a week

She did not care.
Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowksa did not have one iota of care, of empathy, of compassion, for how she treated me, at all.
Ania’s only concern was Ania.

I finally told her she needed to apologize for what she said, for what she did.
“But, I thought that was okay? Like when someone says ‘Nigga, please!’ That’s not okay?”

Okay, hold on a second.
I know we should get on to what the worth is of an apology you have to ask for, but let’s hold off on THAT for a second.

The real issue here is how do you live in the suburbs of Woodbridge, Virginia, go to the high school WE BOTH went to, live in the United States since you were SEVEN YEARS OLD, NOW TWENTY EIGHT (at the time), and NOT know that you don’t say that to a black man, especially one that has never conducted himself as the average black man (the stereotype), and is someone you claim to love??????

And I, stupidly falling for this act, explained to her how they were different things, and it was NOT okay.

A black and a white dog, getting along

Animals don’t know or care about Racism

But, even after all of this, that wasn’t the last time she did it.

Angry Wolfeboro residents called for a police commissioner to resign after he admitted using a the “N – Word” to describe the president. The worst part is he admits it, but will not apologize. #WTF
Screen Shot 2014-03-15 at 10.24.45 AM

That wasn’t the last time Ania Anicca / Ania Ziolkowska called me a nigger, unprovoked, and uncalled for.

(To be continued)

You deserve a treat after all of that, so here you go.


Yogis are not Saints – Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca and her network of spies and stalkers

Ania Ziolkowska  would like to think she’s a crafty one.
However, she’s not as crafty as she thinks.

Example –

Amy Roman, Spying for Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca - Why do people even DO this????

Amy Roman, Stalking for Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca – Why do people even DO this????

If we’re wondering who Shiva Ka Li is, she’s a friend named Lauren Bautista, whom I met in Hong Kong, several years ago, who now lives in Singapore.

But she’s not important to this matter.

Who really IS of concern is Amy Roman

Amy Roman and Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca are "FRIENDS" Proof of Ania Ziolkowska sending people to spy on me

Amy Roman and Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca are “FRIENDS”
Proof of Ania Ziolkowska sending people to spy on me

Or are Amy Roman and Ania Ziolkowska the same person?

See, it seems Amy Roman elected to recently begin to “follow” my friend, Shiva Ka Li, which really means try to spy (stalk me) for Ania Ziolkowska, my wife, whom is supposedly happy in her adulterous relationship with Chris M Sevanick, also known as Chris Exeris of Grains of Sound (a failing side project), and Mindless Faith (a project that seems to have done infinitely better WITHOUT HIS INVOLVEMENT)

Basically, if you’re happy in your current relationship, why are you getting people to spy on the husband you’ve been cheating on?
Especially since Ania Ziolkowska so vehemently stated, in April, how she was not concerned with anything in my life. 

This is not the first time Ania Ziolkowska has done this. Back in 2011 Ania Ziolkowska created a Facebook profile named “Haleigh Clairee” to spy on me directly, on my page, saying she had gone to the University of Georgia, and that she had learned to hoop in Virginia, so I gave her a show.
Instead of doing the right thing, she continued her adulterous relationship with Chris Exeris.

In all reality, they seem to actually be the same exact person, as Amy Roman and Ania Ziolkowska “speak” exactly the same in writing. 

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca doing the Yoga Barbie Doll I saw through 13 years ago

Ania Ziolkowska / Ania Anicca doing the Yoga Barbie Doll I saw through 13 years ago

I usually do not care what goes on, on Ania’s facebook page, and merely type the link (mostly because I can’t believe Ania STILL calls herself “Mukti“) in the blog, as a hyperlink, however, a dream last night made me get up and check something, which brought me this current discovery.

This is middle school behaviour.

Childish, juvenile, and just plain sad.

I’ve instructed my friend to check her “followers”, and block anyone that seems “questionable”, to her.

If Ania Ziolkowska wants to know what’s going on in my life, she will have to do it herself, not continue to hide behind sock puppets.

Our next blog concerning Ania Ziolkowska will be about how she is supposedly a yoga instructor, but the only one anyone has ever seen that has GAINED subcutaneous fat, while most female instructors LOSE it.



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The Demonic State of Egohood – A quickie

Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism by Chögy...

Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism by Chögyam Trungpa (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Ego is able to convert everything to its own use, even spirituality.For example,if you have learned of a particularly beneficial meditation technique of spiritual practice,then ego’s attitude is, first to regard it as an object of fascination and, second to examine it. Finally, since ego is seeming solid and cannot really absorb anything, it can only mimic.

Thus ego tries to examine and imitate the practice of meditation and the meditative way of life. When we have learned all the tricks and answers of the spiritual game, we automatically try to imitate spirituality, since real involvement would require the complete elimination of ego, and actually the last thing we want to do is to give up the ego completely.

However, we cannot experience that which we are trying to imitate; we can only find some area within the bounds of ego that seems to be the same thing. Ego translates everything in terms of its own state of health, its own inherent qualities. It feels a sense of great accomplishment and excitement at having been able to create such a pattern. At last it has created a tangible accomplishment, a confirmation of its own individuality.”

~ Chogyam Trungpa RinpocheCutting Through Spiritual Materialism” 

I have been working on the next part in the Vipassana Series, though I have been held back by some technical difficulties, unfortunately (recovery of emails, etc, for use in the illustration of what is being explained), however, I felt I have not made a post in a while, and though formatting is difficult, am providing a recent “quickie”, so to speak.

I will now provide the following images –

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca doesn't understand the Yoga Sutras

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca doesn’t understand the Yoga Sutras

This is actually amazing, for a psychological case study…..

The page in question is the following:

If anyone understands how pages work in Facebook, there is a “seen” heading on each post, that shows not only how may have seen it, but WHO sees it.

This specific page is about the yoga sutras of patanjali, and Ania Ziolkowska has “seen” every post that has been made on the page, which are verses from the sutras.

Here is where it gets interesting (and when you can know if someone has actually read the sutras, or understands them) –

The only sutras Ania has “liked” so far are also the only ones that can be misinterpreted as ego-centric.

The one and only post Ania Ziolkowska commented on is an exercise in her attempting “magic” – “Say it, and it will be true”

Ania Ziolkowska is STILL attempting to convince herself that everything she is doing, everything she has done so far, is the “right path”, or even a path at all.

Ania Ziolkowska is still attempting to convince herself that everything she gave up was for the right reasons, that it was worth giving up at all.

Ania is looking for forgiveness she doesn’t deserve because she refuses to take responsibility for what she’s done, believing there is a “path” that can avoid that “requirement”.

Ania Ziolkowska is still trying to convince herself she is “happy”.

Maybe some don’t see this, however I would deem that as interesting, due to the fact that, like a child, Ania is ruled by her Id, and has finally reached the point where the Id is all she is, which, essentially, means she’s an empty shell, with very little impulse control.

Also notice that her comment, the only one Ania Ziolkowska has provided, is “shallow”, without any deeper explanation of what the sutra means, to her?

Notice how Ania asks no questions, to gain a deeper or more clear understanding?

Essentially, what Ania Ziolkowska is practicing is a confirmation bias, brought forth by cognitive dissonance, in that she cannot relate the other sutras to herself, and therefore ignores them, as they are too difficult, just as Ania ignores any mention of Yamas – “rights”, or  Niyamas – “wrongs”

And by asking no questions, Ania protects her “Id”, by not chancing that “she”, her Id self, could possibly be wrong.

The avoidance of “Unpleasure”.

Thus taking the safe route.

Ania Ziolkowska merely wishes to be “acknowledged”, but not in a way that is actually beneficial to her.

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca, You're fooling nobody

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca, You’re fooling nobody

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca on her stolen india trip. Ania knew for 10 years I wanted to go to india and kept "us" too broke to do ANYTHING

Ania Ziolkowksa / Ania Anicca on her stolen india trip. Ania knew for 10 years I wanted to go to india and kept “us” too broke to do ANYTHING


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Toxic – Lack of Empathy and the Demonic State of Egohood

People can say anything. It's what you DO that matters.

People can say anything. It’s what you DO that matters.

I have a MULTITUDE of articles to write that I am WAY behind on, due to needing to complete my TESOL course before I run out of time, however, I was actually REQUESTED to write this one, due to others having experienced SIMILAR behavior from the subjects of this particular one.

I will admit that not ALL of my articles are directly involved with “spiritual” or “yogic” peoples, however, as those are aspects of society and the modern human condition, even this applies, as the additional subjects of this blog ARE involved with these people, and thus it illustrates the type of people these frauds attract.

In the end, whether “spiritual” or regular person, the behaviors are the same……

We should note that my history with BeBe goes back to 2010, while she did not meet Ania Ziolkowska or Chris Sevanick until 2012, therefore we can see where Narcissistic Personality Disorder takes precedent, IF the CONSTANT need for ATTENTION (and complete lack of empathy) was not already OBVIOUS…..

“Bebe bellamont??
Even with My limited dealings with Bebe i am not surprised i have no respect for her at all..And yes people are their drama
Please do! [expose her]  She is toxic
Bebe blocked me years ago when she was friends with my ex wife….I called her out on trying to worsen my split with ****** by feeding her a bunch of lies about me fucking a lot of rave hoes.which I wasnt, I was torn up over the seperation…stupid bitch LOL”
~ Anonymous

The provider of that experience asked to remain, anonymous, and I will respect their wishes, but is one of several that asked me to write and provide what is being provided here (links are provided for additional reference) –
BeBe S Bellamont & Rafael Rodriguez, people ARE their drama.

Attention whores and backstabbers

Attention whores and backstabbers

  • Can you do me a favor? If you see my wife at the massive, slap the shit out of her for me. LMAO!!!
    She’ll probably be hanging with a bunch of hoopers.
    Her name is Ania.
  • November 27, 2011
  • awwww! Sorry I just got this message!!!
  • No worries. I was half joking anyway.
    Hope you had a good time.
  • November 27, 2011
  • Yes I need to see you guys soon! I would have loved to have seen her! xoxox
    (Author’s note – This establishes that BeBe already KNOWS all the players involved.)
  • Today
  • bebe slut icon 16:19pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    why would i unfriend you
  • 6:20pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    Read it and you’ll see.
    Takes about an hour.
  • bebe slut icon 16:20pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    i dont have time but i will try to skim
    (Author’s note – She’s FEIGNING ignorance. She already KNOWS all of this.)
  • 6:20pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    It’s pretty revealing.
    It’s significant due to Rafael.
    (Author’s Note – Rafael is a photographer for, and also the personal photographer for Chris Sevanick, as well as HER BOYFRIEND.)
  • 6:22pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    You’ll see.
    That’s all I can say. The rest is in it.
  • so you are an abusive drug adict to them
    (Author’s note – She hasn’t even READ anything yet, SHE ALREADY KNOWS the baseless rumors they spread, because she’s been helping spread them.)
  • 6:25pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    Then just skip to the conversation.
    You’ll see how that’s not true and they know it.
    And “them” is my WIFE and Chris, who used to be a friend.
    Gotta love it.
    (Author’s note – Remember this point. It’s important later….)
  • bebe slut icon 16:25pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    sorry i just dont know where to skip to
    (Author’s note – Didn’t she just navigate this thing a SECOND ago???)
  • 6:25pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    I can’t tell you everything. You have to hear it from their own mouths.
  • bebe slut icon 16:25pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    i am wayy tired
    (Author’s not – This way she can pretend to not know.)
  • 6:25pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    Don’t read it today. Get back to it.
    (Author’s note – Just gave her an “out”. Let’s see what happens.)
  • bebe slut icon 16:25pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    sorry i am sorry i just really dont feel like going through the whole thing
    i am sorry this is going on
    (Author’s note – Remember THIS point, as it REALLY becomes important later.)
  • 6:27pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    It’s not my fault they spent three hours trying to manipulate me. That’s what happens when someone tries to force their lies to be true.
    The irony is that it comes out if their own mouths. Anyone that reads it all the way through….well, skip to the comment section on the bottom. None of those comments have been edited. They’re what people have said. That’s not including private chats with me.
  • bebe slut icon 16:27pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    i dont pass judgment on people based on their drama. i make my own descions
    (Author’s note – And THIS becomes the MOST important of all. Firstly because she’s been spreading rumors for Ania Ziolkowska & Chris Sevanick, but also because it’s a common line used by NPD’s. Also, people ARE their “drama”.)
  • 6:28pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    Lets you know what the people you know are REALLY like.
    But what bothers me most is that people I know KNEW and said nothing to me.
    However, if it were THEM they would have hated me for not telling them.
    It’s the hypocrisy that disgusts me.
    (Author’s note – This was also a test for HER to see if she was really like what everyone told me she IS. Seems she IS.)
  • bebe slut icon 16:28pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    drama sucks period
    (Author’s Note – It’s ALWAYS the ones that say this that cause the most drama.)
  • 6:29pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    No. Hypocrisy sucks worse. It’s unforgivable.
  • bebe slut icon 16:29pm BeBe S. Bellamont
    that is drama lol
    (Author’s Note – She KNOWS I’m talking about HER. She’s doing that ditzy airhead thing that Ania Ziolkowska ALSO does.)
  • 6:30pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    But not drama I created.
    It’s created by those that say they hate drama.
    Look, friends would tell friends information that’s important to them.
    (Author’s note – Let’s see what she does with this…..)
  • i know you are still involved not saying you caused it i am just being empatheci
    (Author’s note – Firstly, WHAT???? So, you’re ADMITTING you KNOW??? Secondly, well, that’s explained in the next line….)

  • 6:31pm Shiva Bodhi Dharma
    That’s what I have Always done, even if the person would have hated me in the end.
    There’s a need to know.
    This is worse because she’s my wife and he was my friend.
    Therefore that’s not empathy. It’s….I won’t say what it is.
    Empathy is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes.
    Not telling someone is NOT empathy.
    You have the evidence. I’m suing Chris for slander. That is all.
  • Good day.

    Seen 8:28 PM

She tries to put on a good “SHOW” of it, though.

“After all, the thinking goes, fourteen-year-old Megan wouldn’t post revealing pictures of herself on MySpace if she had higher self-esteem.
So parents redouble their efforts, telling Megan she’s special, beautiful, and great.
This is like suggesting that an obese person would feel much better if she just ate more doughnuts.
Megan wants everyone to see just how beautiful and special she is, and it’s not because she thinks she is ugly — it’s because she thinks she’s hot and, perhaps more importantly, because she lives in a narcissistic society where she might garner praise, status, and “friends” by displaying blatant sexuality.”
~ Dr. Jean M Twenge, PhD , “The Narcissism Epidemic”